


The Ghost Of You

by LadyAuroraStars



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: AOS has given me a lot to work with but not enough to enjoy, But so does Daisy, Emotional Roller Coaster, Episode: s03e10 Maveth, F/M, Grant Ward Deserved Better, Grant Ward Feels, Grant Ward is Hydra, Hellfire should have lived, I feel too much for these characters who have fucked me up, ITS BECAUSE HE FEELS TOO MUCH, Inhumans - Freeform, Lincoln should be a character that is liked, Minor Lincoln Campbell/Skye | Daisy Johnson, NOW EXPLAIN TO ME HOW YOU FELL FOR HIM, Post 3x10, Post-Episode: s03e10 Maveth, Protective Coulson, Skye dealing with Ward, Skye | Daisy Johnson's Superpowers, Spoilers for Season 3, Ward loved Skye, a little smut, agent first, cap mention cause how can you not, ghost Ward - Freeform, nothing very graphic, person second
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-13
Updated: 2017-02-22
Packaged: 2018-05-13 17:57:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 7
Words: 24,034
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5711746
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyAuroraStars/pseuds/LadyAuroraStars
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After the events of 3x10 Daisy realizes that she was not prepared to deal with Grant Ward's death. She had more to say and he had more to accomplish.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Are you in my head?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story is currently undergoing some editing, but it's also being updated! I would love to read comments and hear what you all think. Thanks so much for reading and going on this AOS rollercoaster ride with me.

The ground beneath them shakes three harsh times after Daisy’s blood runs cold, walls shake, and everyone adjusts their balance. She knows Lincoln is beside her, she knows that Fitz is standing next to Simmons with tears in his eyes, she knows that her heart should feel relief but it doesn’t- she’s not even sure that it’s beating anymore. It’s after the shaking stops that she hears Lincoln call out to her, feels her hands shaking, the tears in her eyes, and realizes that it was her who caused the movement.

 _Ward is no longer a problem_ Coulson had said. She didn’t need to ask to know what that meant, it meant that Grant Ward had died.

“Daisy, can you hear me?” Lincoln asks while grasping her shoulders, but she cannot fix her eyes on him. She can only see Coulson who stands in the middle of the room, with a look of smugness on his face, and when she goes to move towards him the cold, clinical hands on her shoulders hold her back.

“What did you do?” She asks in an almost whisper, and his eyes tell her before he opens his mouth.

“I took care of the problem that is Grant Ward- a hydra agent who was helping to destroy the world. I took care of Hydra’s top agent. He won’t be coming back to this world.” Coulson informs her, standing a little straighter as he looks all around, addressing the room and not just Daisy.

“Is he dead? Did you kill him?” She can hear her own voice, feel her mouth move but cannot seem to control what words come out, or how hostile her tone becomes.

When Coulson just looks at her- as though she had gone crazy. His stare holds no compassion, nothing for her, or the man he had made a part of his family so many moons ago. Still, Coulson says nothing and the longer Daisy stands there, it seems the prouder of himself he gets. Suddenly, around her everyone starts moving, there are better things to do than to discuss Ward’s life.

She flinches as Coulson strides past her, leaving her standing there with Lincoln, and Fitz leaning against the far wall, pulling at the end of his shirt.

“Fitz…what happened?” She asks more calmly, watching as her friend's eyes fill with unshed tears.

He clears his throat a little before saying, “I-I saw it. He’s gone, Daisy.” His small answer ends up being bigger than what is said, the pain all over his face accompanied by the haunted look in his eyes.

Grant Ward is dead, and Phil Coulson had been the one to kill him. Whipping around Daisy follows quickly behind the group to catch up with Coulson, and when she’s close enough she yells.

“What the hell did you do? Huh? You fucking killed him! Do you feel better for having been the one to have taken his life?” She snarls, “Tell me Coulson do you feel like the fucking _hero_?”

Coulson keeps his eyes on the large screen that maps their route and keeps his back turned to her, “You weren’t there, and you clearly are not thinking straight. I killed him because I knew the mission I had to complete.”

If she were a good person she would be angry that Coulson had stolen her closure. The closure to kill the man who had betrayed her, and weaved her into his lies and weaved his way into her life. She would be angry because her former partner’s life was taken by the man who had promised her another world. Daisy was owed closure from Grant Ward's betrayal. A good person would be angry because that closure was no longer possible, but Daisy can’t remember the last time she was considered a _good person_. 

 

* * *

 

 

 

Being here feels odd, like a fish out of water or a Shield Agent in Pajamas but here she is watching the nightly news in her flannels. Skye had been in her little California apartment for three days now, getting “much needed time off” as Coulson had put it when giving her orders to return to her small faux home. He has given her no choice in the matter, and to make Skye feel better May had backed him up on it. She didn’t understand as Coulson raised his voice in front of everyone and told Skye that it was an order, not a suggestion. Fitz had been through much worse but he had received no harsh orders or deadly looks, he was still in the lab and Skye was here, in bed. 

She knew it was because of Ward, because of what she had told Coulson about their relationship, and because of her reaction to the news of his death. Coulson had spared no feelings as he looked up at the room of her adopted family and with pride announced that, “Ward’s no longer a problem”. Skye would be lying if she said it hadn’t made her blood go cold, that it hadn’t hurt more than she knows it should have. She had been sent home to grieve the loss of her enemy, of a man who had once been her guiding light while everyone else celebrated his death.

Lincoln had told her to go home, to take the time for herself, and it pissed her off because he was supposed to be on her side. She had played it off as an anger that she had not been able to be the one to end him, that her revenge had been taken from her, but she knew that everyone else knew it was all lies. Three days of pizza boxes and Chinese takeout have left Skye in a haze. If she didn’t know that her time could be used for something more meaningful, like helping Shield, or monitoring inhumans she would almost enjoy her time off.

It’s that night as Skye lies in her bed catching up on reading material that she has missed out on over her busy last few years that she hears a crash. Jumping from the bed is her instinct kicking in, grabbing the gun in the bedside table is her _training_.

Her feet slowly pad across the soft carpet of the dark hallway, her eyes landing on the kitchen. There in the soft street light glow that drifts through the window. Standing there above her kitchen sink is a figure, tall and shadowed facing away from her. In the doorway she pauses, aiming her gun at the center of the strangers back. Her breathing is steady, and before she can make another move the soft sound of laughter fills the room.

“Are you really going to shoot me again? Wouldn’t that be a little dramatic?” The voice that fills the room makes her grasp her gun tighter, and as he turns toward her, she feels her pulse start to race. “To shoot me again?”

Standing in her dark kitchen is Grant Ward. Grant Ward who has been dead for five days, stranded on another planet. He looks the same as he had the last time he saw her, dark clothes, leather jacket, thick beard, and for one split second Daisy wishes he was real.

Closing her eyes she wishes him away, knows that there is no way that Ward is standing here in front of her.

“Just because you want me to go away does not mean I am going to.” He comments, and she can hear the smile in his voice.

She opens her eyes and can feel her hands tighten up as they white knuckle her gun, ready at any moment to shoot this familiar figure. “Is this a Hydra trick?” She questions.

He looks to the ground, his facial features covered in shadows from the darkness. “Hydra’s not here Skye.”

“Aren’t you hydra?”

His frown brings out the creases around his mouth, “No, this is just a trick of your mind. I don’t have to be anything you don’t want me to be. I would not suggest shooting me, it will just shatter your window.”

She looks around the room, at the small enclosed space they are in, “I’m not crazy”

He holds up both hands, “Never said you were.”

“You’re dead,” She states, confusion grasping her mind.

He looks around the kitchen, ignoring her statement. “I never imagined you here.” He smiles as he moves, “I do love the pajamas, though.”

Daisy’s whole body hesitates, and then slowly she lowers her gun.

“I always imagined a bigger house, maybe a dog, some kids running around.” She tenses as he walks past her, slowly bumping his arm into hers, and she follows after him into the living room, “Not white picket fence, cause we just are not those people. It would be too boring, but it would be home. An escape from the world.” He tells her.

Her small living room is home to a large desk homing computers and all sorts of technology- he slowly runs his hand over all of it. She keeps her distance watching him, confused as to how he seems so real, she had felt how solid he is but she knows that he is dead- at least, that’s what she was told.

“Are you in my head?” She asks finally as he looks towards her again, his big brown eyes meeting hers.

She eyes him as he slowly pulls off his jacket, leaving him in a black tee that hugs his body. “Do you want me to be?” He quirks an eyebrow at her. “I always imagined a place that we could finally find our happiness at. Maybe a lake, or the mountains? You like the beach though don’t you?” He questions as though it’s just another day.

“Why are you here?” She presses as he seems to dodge all of her questions.

He walks up to her, so close that she once again can confirm that he is solid- just as solid as she is, and his body is pressed up against hers. “I am here to check on you, to make sure you’re alright. I clearly seem to be the only one who cares.”

“You’re dead. You cannot be here. Coulson left you there, dead. There is no way that you’re here right now.”

“Maybe I’m not.” He whispers to her and walks off down the hall. "But, it wouldn't be the first time you brought me back."

When Daisy is able to process what just happened she goes down the hall and finds it empty. The whole apartment is empty, and whatever kind of mental breakdown she just has been over. _**I am not crazy**_ she tells herself over and over as she grabs her things, and makes her way out of the apartment.

“Lincoln, I’m coming back,” She says into her phone as she puts her car in drive.

 

* * *

 

 

 

Two weeks back at Shield and everyone finally has a moment to relax. Daisy and Lincoln have been running around finding inhumans all around the world. It’s been nice, seeing as how it's let Daisy avoid everyone on the base. A man who is able to able to control water with his mind, a little girl with powers similar to Daisy’s own and she's been able to help them, to explain that everything is going to be okay. 

They finally are called back into base after receiving strict orders from May. Lincoln and Daisy’s relationship has been at a somewhat stand still. They travel together and live their lives about the same way that they did before except they don’t ever talk about anything other than work, they are coworkers, not two people falling in love.

Lincoln tried to bring up Ward’s death and Hydra once to Daisy at the beginning of their travels and she had glared at him and put her headphones in. He didn’t bring up the subject again, he also never brings up her midnight phone call on her time off. The one where she sounded freaked out, and needed him to meet her at the airport with the Shield jet. He didn’t bring up the fact that she only had one bag, and was still in her pajamas. She was hell bent on going back to the base, and so that’s what happened. Almost imminently they were sent out on jobs.

When they return to the base they are greeted with Jemma who goes off talking to Daisy about some kind of chemical she found in a blood report. Jemma follows Daisy all the way into her little bedroom and sits on the bathroom counter as Daisy showers off.

“So, we placed the blood sample into the computer to see if there has ever been anything else with such chemicals in the system before. Fitz thinks that her blood might be producing it naturally. It's quite odd, I’ve never heard of such thing. Cassie is only twelve but she is a very intelligent child, and is handling this whole thing very well.” Jemma hollers over the sound of the streaming water.

At some point, Daisy pushes Jemma’s talking out of her mind, a little noise of acknowledgment every now and again. Just as she washes the shampoo out of her hair Jemma announces that she is headed back to the lab, and that is where she’ll be when Daisy needs her, and the minute she hears the door shut she hears him.

“Do you think her brain ever stops running at lightspeed?” He says with an annoyed sigh.

Daisy yanks back the shower curtain to find Grant Ward leaning against the closed door of the steamy room. “Your back,” Daisy says while pulling the curtain closed again.

“Well, I couldn’t just leave without knowing you are alright. I’m your SO it is my job.” Grant says as Daisy lays her forehead against the damp shower wall.

Signing she frowns, “You have not been my SO in a very long time. I’m Shield, you are a _Nazi_ remember?”

His out loud laugh makes her jump out of her skin. “I am also very dead, yet here I am. And, I have never been a Nazi- Hydra is different than Nazi’s.” Ghost Ward bites back.

“You clearly still don’t understand your job description.” Daisy pipes under her breath.

“I am in your head Skye, I can hear you even when you whisper.”  He whispers but it sounds as though he is in her ear.

Aggravated Daisy replies, “We are enemies, you died my enemy and you died Hydra. Therefore, Nazi.”

She rinses warm water over her face, turns off the water, and reaches a hand out of the curtain searching for a towel to dry off with. Like she knew it was coming, she doesn’t jump or even become startled when she feels his hand guiding her own toward the towel hanging on the wall.

“That girl you found Cassie? You going to mentor her?” He asks as she pulls the towel around her body.

 “How can I mentor someone when I can barely get a handle on my own abilities?” Skye questions as she steps out.

Grant Ward looks down at her, and with a sincere look on his face whispers, “You have more control over those abilities than you realize Skye. That little girl needs your help, someone to look up to and help guide her through this. The kind of person you and I never had. That person should be you.”

Daisy looks at him puzzled over his thoughts about Cassie, and asks. “Why are you calling me _Skye_? You’re in my head, you should be calling me Daisy. That’s my name.”

Ward opens the small bathroom door letting in a chill, causing Daisy’s skin to prickle. “Maybe, I call you Skye because deep down you miss it, and we both know Skye will always be mine. Will always be in my heart, and maybe Daisy won’t ever be because I didn’t know her- I know Skye though.”

Daisy walks past ghost Ward and out into the bedroom, and Ward follows right out after her. Grabbing her clothes, she strips her towel away and stands there looking at the recent purple bruise on her side.

“What are you doing?” Ward asks clearing his throat.

She winces as she touches the sore skin, “I am looking at the damage that was done in Bali. Tyler is just learning that he has super strength, and just recently found out he can snap a spine with his pinky finger.” Daisy informs him, mentioning another young inhuman who she has taken in.

“You should put on some clothes.” Ghost Ward barks at her.

With a smile, Daisy turns to him, “Even in my head you are a prude.”

As she pulls on a shirt and some pants Ward takes a seat on the bed. “Have I mentioned that I like the short hair? It’s much better than the bangs.”

Daisy, faking offense turns towards the mirror again, “What was wrong with the bangs? Why should your opinion matter, you’re not even real”

“Who you talking to Daisy?” She jumps and turns to see Lincoln standing in the doorway.

“God Lincoln you scared me! I was just singing to myself. Is- is Coulson ready to debrief us?” She stammers.

“Yeah, you coming?” Lincoln replies holding out his hand.

Turning towards the bed, she sees that ghost Ward has vanished, and she suddenly feels very worried about her mental health. “Let’s go.” They walk out of the room hand in hand.

* * *

 

 

She comes across Fitz sitting on the stairs that lead up to the extra weapons room. He is looking at a tablet, and his brow is furrowed. Daisy approaches him quietly and takes a seat beside him, Fitz only looks up at her once she has settled beside him.

“Hey.” She greets him with a small smile that is full of sad eyes. She notices that Fitz is looking at a picture- a picture of him and Ward. “When is that from?” 

Fitz looks back down at the picture and smiles, “This is from my first official mission for Shield. We did a sweep in New York after the attack. Ward went down with me to collect samples of the DNA that were left behind. We went and picked up hot dogs from the one stand that wasn’t destroyed.” Fitz laughs quietly at the memories.

The photo is clearly old, they both look younger, and are both much smaller than from when she has known them. Ward has his arm thrown over Fitz's shoulder, and Fitz is holding at least four huge hot dogs in both hands, looking as though he is going to drop them at any moment. Both have big smiles on their faces, as though the photo had been taken while they hysterically laughed. It's a picture from another time, the people in that photo don't exist anymore.

For a while, Daisy and Fitz just sit there admiring the photo but suddenly Fitz turns to her with tears in his eyes and says, “I miss him. Often, I miss him often.”

It hits Daisy hard when he says this because Fitz has a deep pain in his voice, and she understands it almost better than anyone.

“I don’t mean I miss Hydra Ward, I just miss Grant, you know? The one that was my best friend, and the man I looked up to.” Fitz mummers as he wipes at his eyes and Daisy is painfully reminded that Fitz was there.

Grabbing his hand, Daisy finds a strength within herself and tells him, “If you want to talk, I’m here Fitz. You can talk to me about anything.”

Fitz knows that Daisy is hiding her hurt, knows that she is missing Grant just as much as he is. “ I see it whenever I close my eyes. I see him, and Coulson.” Fitz says around fresh tears, “I know Coulson had to do it, I know he had to be stopped but the way- it was brutal, and no matter how awful he was he didn’t deserve it.” Fitz runs a hand over the screen of the tablet, “I see it every time I close my eyes. No one gets it, they all just saw him as Hydra eventually- he was the bad guy in their eyes but even after everything he did- to me, to Jemma, to you I still just wanted to be able to find the Grant that was my best friend again, I know he had to be in there somewhere.”

By the time he stops talking Daisy is crying along with him. Silent tears that roll down her cheeks, and anger that fills her heart. Anger because she knows how Fitz feels, after everything he had done, after all the hate she felt towards Grant Ward she still wanted to be able to find her Ward. Her SO, the man who had helped her understand who she needed to be, the one she confided in.

“Your right, they don’t understand that. They won’t ever understand that Fitz. They will forever see him as the traitor, and Hydra. He was the enemy, not the man we thought he could be.” And that pisses her off- that she and Fitz cared about Ward enough that he got under their skin, that they allowed him to be a hero in their minds even when he was the opposite. He made them love a false person, someone who would hurt them even when he was gone. 

“He loved you, you know. After everything.” Fitz tells her as he stands to his feet, dusting his hands on his pant.

“He loved you too, Fitz.” She says back and watches as he goes down a few steps.

Fitz nods, and then grins to himself, “He loved himself a little too much to fully love us, though. It’s what got him killed, at least, that’s what everyone has been telling me.” Fitz descends the stairs now, and opens the door at the bottom, looking up at Daisy, “It all doesn’t change that I miss him, though. I've missed him for a long time but this is different.” Fitz shuts the door behind him, leaving her in the empty stairway. 

* * *

 

 

It’s late one night sitting in the control room of the Z when Daisy finds herself alone with Coulson for the first time in almost three weeks. She feels a pang in her chest when he opens the door behind her and slowly closes it. She keeps her eyes on the laptop in front of her and types fast, with harsh angry movements.

The rest of the Heli craft is quiet, and the team in sleeping in the bunks, everyone bunkered down for the upcoming mission Coulson has set them out for. He’s quiet as he walks around the table she sits at, and she watches him out of her peripheral vision. He sits down with a mug in his hands and glasses on the bridge of his nose. His mechanical hand is uncovered and throws a glare around the very dark room. He sips his drink while looking down at the table, pressing some buttons here and there, surely checking on security, and flight patterns.

She hears him sigh and pauses when he asks. “What are you doing up so late?” Her fingers stop mid-air, and she glances at the clock in the corner of her screen, _03:22_.

She debates on answering him, or if silently getting up and leaving is the better decision. She chooses the former, “Couldn’t sleep.” She mutters as she goes back to her typing.

Coulson nods his head, understanding. “What are you doing to kill time?” He asks with another sip of whatever liquid filled his mug.

With a set of her jaw, Daisy answers with an annoyed, “Work.”

It an odd feeling for her, to have such angry feelings towards this man who had become such an important father figure in her life. Their relationship was always smooth, no matter how much they had gone through, and she had never found she could stay angry with him for long periods of time but here she is three weeks in and still as pissed as before.

“What work?” He pushes, leaning over the table focusing on something.

Slamming her middle finger down on the _enter_ key Daisy icily replies, “I am trying to crack into this Hydra firewall so we can see where they took the key.”

Coulson looks up at her, “You sure that’s the only reason you are so hell bent on going on the ground for this mission? So, you can get into the control center to lock them out because we could send Hunter like we have before, you can give him instruction in his earpiece.” Coulson suggests as he scans his eyes over the dark circles that decorate Daisy’s face. “I know going back to this place is not- well, it’s not ideal but we have to find them.”

Daisy slams her laptop shut, “I am going on the ground because I am the only one that is going to be able to get this done quickly enough Coulson. I am going on the ground with May so I can make sure that we get that damned key.”

“You’re sure that’s all this is about Skye?” He argues.

“Don’t call me that!” Daisy exclaims, standing up and collecting her things from the table.

Coulson, in turn, stands with her, “I’m sorry, I forget sometimes. Habit.” He says raising both his hands motioning for her to stay, and he looks at her dead in the eyes as his voice becomes soft, quiet. “You won’t find his body down there Daisy. He is still on that planet, and he is not coming back. You are not going to get any closure going down there, Daisy!” Coulson tells her.

Running a hand over her face Daisy grunts, and takes a deep breath before replying. “I am not going down there to find anything, I am going down there to do my job because I am the only one who can do it.”

“Grants dead. He gave us no other choice Daisy, and you dwelling on that will only put you in danger. Dying won’t make you a hero.” Coulson whispers, making Daisy pause in the doorway.

“Do you think you killing him made you a hero?” She asks in a hushed voice.

“I knew you wouldn’t be able to do it.” Coulson confesses, “And, yes I was fueled by anger, and a need for revenge but I also knew there would not be a better moment to take out the threat. I knew that if he stood in front of you, and you had a moment to take him out- you wouldn’t be able to do it.”

Daisy grips the laptop in her hands, and blinks away unfallen tears, “How are you allowed to make that decision?” She questions him.

Coulson looks down at the radar, the one that is showing him live traffic camera footage of Grant Ward in Brazil. “Because, you said it yourself you both see each other through a very specific lens, and I can see that with that lens you could never let him die- let alone be the one to make his heart stop, just like he would never be able to do anything to you. You both are too important to the other. So, I did it for you. You might not understand that right now, but I hope one day you will.”

Turning back to Coulson quickly she meets his confident eyes with sorrowful ones, “I’m not sure I ever will.”

 

 

 

 


	2. Wanna play some battleship?

 

Its three months after Grant Ward’s death that Daisy finds herself met with the harsh smoke of a fire pit. On a random detour in Canada the team decided that cabin camping for a New Year’s celebration would do them all some good. However, Daisy was a little opposed to such a trip with everything that was occurring within Hydra, and it meant that she was without internet access for a few days. She puts on a smile for Lincoln who is like a kid in a candy shop as he unpacks the jeep.

The sun had gone down hours ago, and the cold set in rapidly. Daisy had settled under a warm flannel blanket before anyone else had even decided it was time to get comfy. Bobbi has Jemma start throwing training punches at her, Mac and Lance survey the nearby river and Daisy plants herself on a comfy log. Fitz’s fire is a fierce one and gives off enough heat that Daisy is pretty sure she could fall asleep outside in front of it. Lincoln is laughing along with Jemma as he takes a long pull from his beer. Mac announced he is quite the talent with a guitar, and Lance well- he’s wondering off with a big pile of fireworks.

Daisy says a small thanks as Bobbi hands her a spiked hot chocolate.

She almost jumps when she sees him there, standing right behind Fitz who is sat on a camping chair. He is wrapped in a thick sweater and scarf. The sight of him makes her sad, and Daisy is suddenly taken out of the moment. Her mind drifts- drifts to times that are better left forgotten- times that she knows will forever hold a spot in her mind- no matter how poisonous they are.

Images of a different life, one where Grant Ward stood beside her in gunfire, drifted in and out along with the hazy glow of the fire. A time when she had noticed ever little movement, or at least she thought had. Another world were maybe he was sitting here beside her, making Fitz smile and lighting fireworks himself despite being uptight about it. Here she was though, holding her breath, waiting on the day that he would no longer make an appearance in her life. She was waiting on a time when there was no part of her, even a little bit in love with Grant Ward anymore, but it seemed that day was not going to be coming any day soon.

“Daisy, honey.” She hears as her eyes blink and a hand shakes her forearm. She turns to see Lincoln.

Lincoln all blonde hair, and blue eyes. Khaki pants, and sincere worry. Good deeds and even better intentions, decisions made based on goodness. A man who was completely content with who he was, someone who accepted her for everything she was. This was the man she had always dreamed of, someone who put her above everything else. Someone who would be there for her unconditionally. This was the type of man every little girl searched out in the world for, and an innocent part of her was drawn to the innocence in his eyes. A part of her, deep inside, also knows that this man will never be able to fully understand her, he will never be able to find the darkest parts of her.

“Where’s your mind?” He whispers to her as he sets his chin on her shoulder. His blue eyes searching her brown ones.

“With me.” The man standing above Fitz says as he stares off into the fire.

Daisy smiles at Lincoln, “With you…also with the fact that we have no wifi, but I think I will survive.”

Lincoln can’t help the smile on his face as she jokes. “Well, we have fireworks. Who needs wifi when Hunter wants to set an entire forest on fire?” He jokes back.

“I heard that!” Hunter’s thick accent yells across the camp causing them all to laugh.

Fitz abruptly stands, a worried yet amused look on his face, “I am going to check on him, and make sure that inebriated Hunter understands that fireworks cannot be lit under trees.” He motions out into the dark.

“Also remind him that they cannot go off until midnight!” Daisy yells as he wonders off.

“I think we should make this trip more often. It’s really done us some good, I don’t know about you but I feel more relaxed than I have in months.” Lincoln comments, while giving Daisy a little peck on her cheek.

“Oh, isn’t that nice Skye?” Ghost Ward remarks while sitting down in the empty spot Fitz left, leaving him a dark outline behind fire flames.

“That would be fun, you seem to really love it out here,” She observes as she grabs another marshmallow out of the bag, popping it in her mouth.

Lincoln grabs one himself, placing it on the end of a stick, and holding it above the open flames. “You’re supposed to roast it silly.” He pokes a finger in her rib.

“Yeah Skye, eat the marshmallows right! What is wrong with you?” Ghost Ward chastises sarcastically.

It’s sitting there that night that Lincoln says it, and the force from his words is enough to cause Daisy more pain than joy. The clock strikes midnight and suddenly fireworks fill the sky in one of the most beautiful moments Daisy has ever seen, the whole camp is lit by the light of the big explosions in the sky. Its then that Lincoln is suddenly kissing her, it soft and pure. The kind of kiss you imagine as a little girl, it makes Daisy smile as she pulls away with a _Happy New Year,_ and then Mac starts screaming it. Screaming it so loud suddenly you can hear it over all of the fireworks, and Fitz who had given Simmons a small peck is screaming it with him, and suddenly they all are screaming to the dark, star filled sky.

As Daisy looks around at her small family who are all completely free, completely ecstatic for the New Year. Daisy cannot help the pain in her gut, the one that is telling her that she has no right to be completely happy.

“Happy New Year Skye” He tells her from across the fire, his dark eyes meeting hers with a small grin.

She thinks about last year, about how they spent it together with FitzSimmons in the lab, all eating pizza and laughing. About how that is one memory that no ill will is ever going to be able to touch.

“Hunter that was spectacular!” Simmons compliments him as the fireworks finally stop.

It gets quiet, and Daisy can’t help but wonder if everyone else is thinking about all the hell they lived through over the past year, if they are all reflecting on their scars- or if that’s only her.

“A year changes a lot.” Ward says as he is suddenly sitting beside her, opposite side of Lincoln.

 _It does. It changed everything._ She thinks as Lincoln takes a hold of her hand, holding it in his own. Everyone gets up, one by one to go inside over the next hour or so and Daisy lays her head on Lincolns shoulder, cuddling into him for warmth. It’s there sitting under the stars in front of a fire, in the chilly early hours of New Year’s day that Lincoln presses his lips to her ear and whispers, “I love you” almost so quietly that she would not have heard him if there had been any other noise.

She pulls away to look at him, and meeting his blue eyes realizes that her face might show all of her worrying. Since when does someone worry when another person professes love to them? Why does it scare her that this perfectly acceptable guy loves her? Why does it make her feel like she should crawl into this fire in front of her? Why does she not say it back right away? Why does she hesitate? Why does she not know her feelings for him yet? Why is she having some sort of mental break and seeing her dead enemy all of the time?

“You do?” She asks to cover for her hesitation.

It’s the grunt behind her that makes her tense up just the slightest. “It’s not the right kind of love. Not the kind you deserve or need Skye.” Grant Ward protests behind her.

_You don’t know what I need, or deserve. You made that clear a long time ago.- what is this? Thoughts? Projecting what?_

Lincoln just smiles as he looks at her, “Of course I do. I have for a while but…I just felt like this was the right time to tell you.”

“You love me.” She says with a small smile, and before she knows what is coming out of her mouth she says, “I love you too Linc.” And she instantly regrets it, it’s accompanied by a sinking ill feeling in the pit of her stomach.

“No, you don’t Skye. Don’t lie to yourself.” Ward's voice comments in the back of her mind, “And I knew what you deserved…I just wasn’t able to give it to you.” He confesses as his voice suddenly fades, along with his presence.

 

* * *

 

“Wanna play some battleship?” She hears as her eyelids slowly open to a room full of sun.

She’s in a safe house in Southern England, her mission bringing her and Mac here searching for a young boy who can focus all of his energy on turning things into ice. It's quite impressive, and also very scary. The young boy, Ryan was unaware of how to control this gift and had made national news when he froze a teacher. His parents had him in hiding, and Coulson had contacted them, promising safety and offered one of the safe houses to them. Coulson had been insistent that Daisy drops everything to go find this boy so that he didn’t bring any more attention to himself. Daisy insisted that she take Mac with her- it seemed that over the last few weeks Lincoln had become suffocating, in a way that was downright claustrophobic.

There, lying beside her in bed as she wakes, face tucked under the sheets mirroring her own face, greeting her with morning eyes is Grant Ward. Who she can say has officially been deceased for five months, and who she is still seeing.  She does constantly, and at first, she thought maybe she should do something about it- talk to someone or something, but then she realized how much she enjoyed seeing him. Having him there, even if he was just in her head.

“Or we could just lay in bed for hours, it seems more appropriate.” She says in a whisper as her eyes dance across his never changing face.

She can feel his hand as it grabs onto hers, and she can’t help but ask herself- _have I finally gone crazy?_

“How come I can feel your skin touch mine?” Daisy asks the Ward that is a figment of her imagination.

He grins at her, his brown eyes dancing with amusement, “Don’t ask questions you know I can’t answer.”

“That’s the one things that has changed, you don’t have the answer to everything.” Daisy mumbles into the sheet.

Grant simply smiles, and then runs a hand along her arm, causing goosebumps to form. “I’m here to make sure that you’re okay, and not spill all of my important knowledge to you.”

 They lie there for longer than Daisy had planned, just looking at one another. She marvels at the how she can still see him, how she can still feel him. How his beautiful skin is so perfect, and how his eyes give nothing away but always show everything he’s feeling.

Within that moment Daisy didn’t know if she still hated him, or hated herself. Hated him for wedging his way into her life so much that she sees him, or hating herself for letting herself become so attached to a man who was meant to guide her, but only did so with evil intentions. She didn’t know if she hated him for making her fall in love with Grant Ward, Shield’s top agent or if she hated herself for being stupid enough to not force herself to fall out of love when he turned out to be one of Hydra’s top agents.

“Knock, knock.” Mac says loudly as he opens her door, letting in a sweep of coldness. “You up? We need to get going pretty soon.”

Daisy sighs and rolls over toward Mac, “Yeah, just having a little trouble leaving my warm bed.”

Mac nods, looking around like he almost doesn’t believe her. “Well, coffees downstairs along with our briefing. See ya in a bit.” And with that, he closes the door.

“Can we just pretend the world outside doesn’t exist?” Wards husky voice pleads with her.

She rubs a hand over her face, “But, it does. You’re the thing that doesn’t exist.”

Grants warm body is suddenly gone, leaving a warm spot in the bed that makes Daisy wonder how that warmth exists, if she is truly insane, or if her dead S.O left it there.

 

* * *

 

Walking down the hall Daisy and Mac could see the team gathered in Coulson’s office, looking as though they were in the middle of an intense conversation. Mac clears his throat as they approach the doorway, and all eyes glance up to meet them.

“What’s going on?” Daisy had questions, her eyes catching Coulson as he quickly turns off his computer.

Daisy glances around the room at her team, all of them clearly having been interrupted during something important- something no one was telling her about. Something that left a thick, bad taste in the air. Fitz looks distressed while Simmons grips his hand, both sharing a little couch. While Bobbi and Hunter both wear the same frowning expression. May is gripping the large oak desk so hard her knuckles are white, while Coulson is sat in the large leather chair. Everyone shares a similar look- the tense posture that seemed to float around the room.

Jemma is the first to speak up, she stands abruptly with a large smile on her face that is clearly forced. “Your back! Lincoln will be so happy to hear that, he was worried.”

Daisy can’t help but notice the quick side glance Bobbi and Hunter share before Bobbi walks up to Mac to give him a hug.

“How did you all enjoy my beautiful home?” Hunter offers as he stays leaning against the wall.

“It would have been better had we had gotten what we went for.” Mac replies in a monotone voice, pulling off his baseball hat.

“Well, the kids scared. His parents probably moved him off the map. We can’t help those who don’t want to be helped.” Hunter comments.

Its then that Daisy can’t help but feel as though Mac was prompting him for a rehearsed answer, and Daisy finds it in herself to ask to question that she had been thinking of since finding nothing in England.

“Why would they tell you they were there that morning Coulson if they had been planning on leaving?” Daisy asks Coulson in a tone that comes out rather harsh and accusing.

The question seems to breathe life back into the room, and suddenly it feels as though everyone is moving, and everyone is talking, but not about anything that is on the subject of the young boy. Standing, and quickly moving, Fitz walks right past Daisy without even a glance in her direction. May grabs some files from a shelf, and Coulson takes a sip of coffee looking down at his hand. Hunter asks if anyone is hungry and Mac nods, before following him out of the room. Bobbi tells May she has to go check on some test results, and they both smile as they walk past Daisy and down the hall.

It leaves Jemma looking guilty as she is left standing in the middle of the room with Coulson sitting behind his desk. Her face says a million different things, and emotions flicker across it so quickly that Daisy cannot keep up.

“What was that about?” Daisy asks pointing behind her at the departed team.

Jemma shakes her head, “Everyone just feels bad that you went down there, and that boy was gone. But while you were gone Cassie went through a lot of training with Lincoln, and he says she has been improving very well. Joey has been helping her as well, I suppose that is also helping. She will be very happy to know you have returned.” Jemma’s words come out in one long breath and she doesn’t blink once as she goes over what Daisy has missed. “But, other than that it’s been pretty quiet around here.”

“That’s good. Thanks for keeping an eye on her Jem. I know it’s not your job, she’s not your responsibility but I really appreciate it.” Daisy thanks Jemma while taking a seat in the chair opposite Coulson.

Coulson glances at Daisy once, then takes another sip of coffee before saying, “Sorry that you both went all the way out there. I haven’t been able to contact the boy’s parents. Who knows why they left. I suppose it will always be a mystery to us.”

Daisy bites her lip once before she replies, “Why would they leave the door open and most of their things?”

Coulson furrows his brow, and with heavy authority in his voice says, “I told you before Daisy, they are trying to throw us off their tail. That’s all. Their child is a danger and I am sure they are scared for him, they are not like us, and they do not understand how he could ever come to control his powers”

“Daisy!” A voice cuts Coulson off, but instead of following the voice Coulson keeps his eyes squinted at Daisy.

Lincoln, oh Lincoln. Her Lincoln, that one that she had not missed once while she was away but knows that she should have. A good person would have missed this man who she knows desperately missed her. He smells of mint, and almost nothing else- a scent that smells almost clinically clean. She should feel comfort from that smell, but all she can think about is how it smells like the room she woke back up in after her death.

Daisy meets Coulson’s eyes over Lincolns shoulder as he grabs her up into a hug. Coulson’s eyes tell her that she is fooling no one but Lincoln. Her eyes snap close, in guilt or shame she is not sure.

“I missed you.” He whispers before placing a small kiss on her cheek. “Everything was good? I’m so sorry Ryan wasn’t there.”

Daisy paints a big smile onto her face, “I missed you too.” She tells him. “How was everything while I was in the freezing cold land of British accents?”

Lincoln’s face gives him away before he can help it, lying not necessary his forte. His eyes flicker to Jemma and Coulson before setting his blue eyes on her brown pair again. “It was great. Boring really, but Cassie is learning to control her power with finding a way to control her anger, and it’s helping so much Daisy. She is going to be able to completely control it so soon.” He tells her, feigning excitement.

“Coulson, I need to talk to you.” Bobbi’s voice says from behind Daisy.

Turning towards her she sees the tall blonde in a white lab coat, a large stack of paper in her gloved hands. Jemma at some point had gone over, her eyes scanning over white sheets of paper. Jemma glances up once at Coulson before leaving the room.

Lincoln pat’s her arm, in an attempt to pull Daisy’s attention, “I go in for my agent assessment next week.”

“What is it, Bobbi?” He questions standing, adjusting his suit.

Bobbi clears her throat once, her stance becoming a little ridged. “You need to come down to the lab to look at these results.” She informs him, her voice overly professional and then turns, leaving the room.

Daisy watches as Coulson disappears down the hall towards the lab, and Cassie suddenly appears at the door. Her long blonde hair in two braids, and dressed in all black Daisy almost laughed at the mini S.H.I.E.L.D agent.

“Hey, Daisy.” Cassie says in her small, squeaky voice.

For the first time since landing back on base, Daisy smiles a genuine smile. “Hey, blondie.”

Cassie smiles back, taking a seat on the sofa. However, Lincoln’s eyes have yet to adjust to Cassie and are still trained on the place that Coulson had disappeared. Daisy places her hand on his chest lightly to catch his attention. His baby blue eyes meet Daisy’s quickly before they drift off again.

“I’m- I’m just gonna go catch up to make sure they can read those results correctly. They might be Cassie’s vitals.” Lincoln smiles, “I am sure everything is just fine, but I wanna check it out.” Lincoln tells her, his eyes not meeting hers, before disappearing down the same hall everyone else had.

Daisy contemplates following them, snooping to find whatever it is that they all seem to know that she doesn’t. Or maybe she’s just paranoid. But, she does know that when she showed up to that safe house this morning that the door had been knocked down, and everything had been rifled through- the safe house had looked anything but safe, and Ryan and his parents were nowhere to be found. Mac had played it off, and when she had called Coulson to tell him her concerns he acted as though nothing was unusual about a family disappearing from a safe house.

“He’s lying you know.” Cassie pulls Daisy out of her thoughts, “They’ve been weird. Weirder than normal since you left.” Cassie tells her, as she looks down the dark hall.

Daisy raises an eyebrow at her, going to sit beside the small girl who looks completely out of place in Coulson’s office. “Oh, yeah?”

Cassie nods, “Panicky, Fidgety- I guess. But, I don’t know what’s going on- no one tells me anything around here.”

“You just have to give it some time. You are a new- a super young girl running around base. After awhile you will fit right in.” Daisy try’s to assure her.

Cassie just shakes her head, “It’s not that. They don’t tell me things because I have these powers because they don’t trust me. Not really. They don’t trust you either, it’s why there not telling you things.”

Daisy meets the girl’s big blue eyes, and realizes that she’s right. They don’t fully trust Daisy, and she knows that. They never really have, she was the adopted tech girl who had become more than any of them had expected. She looked at them as family, but did they look at her the same way, or was she just this girl with powers who scared them? Ward was the only one who had ever fully trusted her, and he didn’t even fully trust her. He had lied to her every chance he got. 

“I know.” Daisy’s voice cracks as she agrees with the young girl, they are all lying to her. All of them are keeping the same secret from her. They all know something she doesn’t. That should rattle her, and it does. It makes her feel unsafe, like the walls around her know more about herself than she does.

 

 


	3. Nothing will ever be bigger than us.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter is here. 
> 
> I am still crying from my Skyeward feelings. They run deep and always will. AOS has plunged the knife deeper and I am honestly so sad that they have decided to waste such great characters and storylines. 
> 
> I would like to thank my wonderful Beta, Zombiecazz for fixing this chapter for me because it really was shitty when I sent it her way. 
> 
> Hope you all enjoy!

Little does Daisy know her team is in a room just down the hall, conferencing on how to keep Hive a secret from her. Lincoln paces around the room, scorching the pattern of his paces into the floor. It makes everyone else nervous to see Lincoln, who is always as cool as a cucumber, becoming obsessed with keeping this a secret from Daisy.

Coulson had sent Mac and Daisy on a wayward mission, hoping to get Daisy away from the team, so that they could figure out what needed to be done about this creature that had taken over Grant Wards body. Little did they know, this creature who called himself “Hive” was already intercepting the mission to find the young inhuman boy.

The whole team sat and watched, on security cameras, as Hive collected the boy and they all cringed as he sent a metallic looking substance into the boy’s parent’s chests and watched as he walked away with the boy, who suddenly seemed to be very different, as if under some type of influence.

The team took action quickly, Mac disposing of the boy’s parents before Daisy awoke that morning, and then played her off as though he knew nothing. Coulson and Lincoln assured him that it was what was best for her- Everyone seemed to think so. Mac knows he’s not the only one that has noticed how different Daisy became after Wards death. At first it made him angry, because Ward was the enemy! Ward was a Hydra Agent who had infiltrated their team for God sake! He was the enemy, they should have been throwing parties celebrating his demise! But instead Daisy left, she took time off at the request of Couslon, so that she could mourn the man who had put her through hell- The man who had tortured Bobbi, the man that had sent FitzSimmons into hell fire.  This man, who Daisy was mourning, had turned their lives upside down.

At first it had been shocking. To see Grant Ward’s body running around the world, once again causing terror. This time however, they all knew Ward was beyond dead- Coulson had made sure of that. This Ward looked different, he seemed to have some type of inhuman power, and it seemed that no matter where he went people always seemed to follow him. The slew of new followers constantly appeared. It was like watching Hydra on steroids. They had yet to take any action on the situation, despite Mac wanting to.

Coulson thought it would be better to watch from a distance to understand what this creature was after, what his game plan was. It seemed a little odd to Mac that Coulson would just sit and watch as this creature destroyed and killed innocents, but May agreed with Couslon, and in turn FitzSimmons agreed with May.

 

* * *

 

“Daisy.” Lincoln groans as he buries his head into the crook of Daisy’s neck, sweat lining his hairline.

Daisy turns her head to the side, her chest vastly rising and falling. The bedside clock flashing bright red numbers into the dark room, 3:43 a.m blinks at her four times before she shifts her whole body slightly. Lincoln rolls off of her and leaves her staring at the dark, empty ceiling.

Her feelings for Lincoln are… complicated. She has feelings for him, that was undeniable, but to say that she is completely in love with the man lying next to her would be a lie. She was lying to everyone, to him, but they were all lying to her too, _he_ was lying to her. What about? She’s not sure, but she has known since returning to base with Mac three days ago.

Her arm jerks at the pressure of Lincoln’s hand circling her wrist. “You alright?” He asks her quietly.

“I’m fine.” She says as she rolls over, facing away from him. 3:52 a.m the bright red numbers blink at her, the soft red illuminating the bedside table, as if on fire.

As if Lincoln had not gotten her message, he wraps an arm around her waist again, pulling his body into the back of hers, pressing a soft kiss in between her shoulder blades. Her reaction is subtle, a shoulder raises, and she finds herself slightly squirming. Why? Because this had all been fun, Lincoln had been fun until it suddenly became very serious. Until he’d pulled her sweater over her head, and in hushed tones told her she was beautiful.

It should have made her feel good, because this man who had helped her get through so much felt something for her, but a part of her that’s buried deep down, is selfish and chants darkly with disappointed. It was one thing for someone to tell you their feelings, it’s a whole other thing to feel that truth, to feel it wrap around you, to see it.

“Common Daisy, somethings wrong.” Lincoln says.

Daisy bites her lip, taking a deep breath. “No, Lincoln nothing is wrong. I’m just tired and I’m not much of a snuggler.” She bites.

Quickly, as if he had been burned Lincoln removes his arm from around her waist. “Did I do something to upset you?” Lincoln asks in a much colder tone.

“I’m just tired, Lincoln.” She answers as she slips an arm under her pillow.

She lies there, hoping he would fall asleep but instead she can feel the energy coursing off him. A pulse that lies in the bed next to her-Fuming. An electric energy that fills the room, and makes even her uncomfortable. Lincolns anger at her answers, and reactions penetrate every breath she takes.

At precisely 4:00 a.m Lincoln’s cell phone goes off. He scrambles out of the sheets, diving for his phone in his jean pocket.

“This is Lincoln.” She hears him answer, followed by the sound of rustling clothing, and an “I’ll be right there.”

To this she turns, looking at Lincoln as he is rushing to pull his t-shirt over his blonde curls, a worried look decorating his face.

“What’s wrong?” She asks, sitting up slightly.

He looks up at her as though he had forgotten she was there, and his face comes to rest in a frown. “Everything’s fine.” He says, toeing his shoes on.

“Lincoln, I heard you on the phone.” She informs him, throwing a hand out in a slight gesture.

He shifts his eyes over to her, “Something with the lab, someone needs some stitches and a blood test done. It doesn’t really concern you, you’re tired. Go back to sleep Daisy.” He tells her before slamming the door behind him a little too hard.

She throws herself back onto her pillow with a deep sigh. She almost feels guilty for Lincoln’s mood, she could blame herself but she feels this way because of all the lying that she knew was being said to her face. But, that’s a little hypocritical of her isn’t it? She was also lying. What hadn’t helped was the intense feelings that had hit her as Lincoln groaned into her damp skin. It felt all too clinical, it felt too rushed and it felt different. Different than what she and Lincoln usually felt like. It felt like his actions were for someone else and not her. It felt like a lot of lies, and just about nothing else.

“Well, that sure was anti-climactic.” A smug voice says from somewhere in the dark room.

“Shut up.” She whispers out into the darkness like a mad women, turning back towards the red blinking light.

And there he is. Sitting with his back to the bedside table, his face just inches from hers.

“He sure is loud isn’t he?” Grant remarks from his spot sitting on the floor, “and you, well it looked like you were having so much fun Skye.”

4:13 a.m the bright light blinks at her. “I don’t need your Hydra commentary.” She whispers.

She hadn’t wanted this. She didn’t want to feel a space between her and Lincoln, she desperately wanted to love him, and she wanted that love to be enough to save them from their differences. She also wanted that love to be able to save them from the lies, but she’s scared that the imitation love she’s created is just tearing him from her.

His dark eyes turn on her, and once again accomplish making her feel things that make her feel guilty. “I’m sorry.” He tells her around a soft, kind smile. “I’m sorry this is all so hard for you. It shouldn’t be.”

“I think this might be something you don’t need to be sorry for. He’s lying to me about something.” She tells Ward. “The whole team is, and I have no idea what it is. I thought we were done with lying to each other around here, but turns out you coming out of the Hydra closet has set off a lying domino effect.”

“Well, just give it time. I promise it will come out sooner or later.” He says, “Skye, whatever it is, there’s no reason to fear it so much. It can’t be as bad as what I put you through.”

She runs a hand over her face, a heat rushing down her chest, a dreadful feeling that makes her feel like she’s on a roller-coaster. She shakes her head, “I think you might be wrong. I think it might be bigger than us.”

He glances down at the floor, a soft smile gracing his face. “Us.” He repeats, his eyes finding hers once more. "I'm not sure anything will ever be bigger than us."  “Well, good news for you is that bad sex can be worked on.” He jokes.

They both become quiet after that. Daisy knows deep down that he is probably right, knows that the word ' _us_ ' when passed between them is a word that carries more weight than thousands of pounds.  “Well, good news for you is that bad sex can be worked on.” He jokes.

She smiles. “I didn’t say it was bad!” She defends.

Grant just shakes his head at her, “No, I saw it. It hurt to watch. It was bad.”

“No one asked you to watch!” She glared at him, pulling the sheets up closer to her chin.

His grabs her hand quickly. “I’m in your head Skye. So you tell me why am I here?”

Honestly? She still doesn’t know. All she knows is that she still cannot let him go, and she doesn’t think he will be fading anytime soon.

 

* * *

 

Bobbi and Hunter leave. It’s for their own good, to go start fresh. They deserve to be happy, and Daisy is happy for them but a small piece of her, that one piece doesn’t want them to be. That piece wants them to know what it’s like to know that the other is gone.

Maybe they had felt that way, maybe this was their final happy ending, maybe after this goodbye they could wake up every morning and see each other. If that was the case though, if that was how their lives turned out Daisy knew that deep down she was not completely happy for them, because of her own selfish reasons.

In moments of doubt, in tiny moments when her eyes would catch a tall figure in the corner Daisy used to allow Skye to daydream. Back before Hydra sent them all to hell, back before, when it felt like she had family. Bobbi and Hunter were getting her daydream, and it was a daydream that she would never have now.

“If we can’t find out where they’re hiding then we’re sitting bait!” Daisy hears Coulson yell, as she approaches the kitchen for a second cup of tea that night.

Everyone had gone to bed after drinking more than they should have, but Daisy’s eyes would not shut as she had laid her head on her pillow. So, what better way to spend a sleepless night than with tea and running code for an upcoming mission?

Her movements pause just outside the door, her curiosity getting the better of her.

“I told you I need those codes! I need access to that database before I can send them out there. I need to know just what it is that we are going up against.” Coulson’s heavy breathing fills the empty silence of the unheard answer on the other end of the conversation.

A slam echoes out into the room, and Daisy takes a deep breath before rounding the corner. Coulson is leaning against the kitchen counter in the dark, shards of rough glass lay on the floor across from him. His eyes barley glance up as Daisy walks towards the cold kettle on the stove.

“Trouble sleeping?” He asks her, and Daisy feels as though they have lived in this moment before.

She hears him move behind her, shutting a cupboard, the sound of glass being placed in the sink.

“I thought you were having a better time with that.” Coulson says, “Sleeping pills helped I thought?”

“Also turns out that they make for a very drowsy agent who then has a hard time controlling the earthquakes that she doesn’t realize she is causing.” Daisy reminds him.

The sleeping pills had helped for a while, a week maybe, but then when talking with Simmons the base was suddenly shaking, and Daisy awoke to Mac carrying her to her room. She had caused quite a disaster. Turns out, when she’s not completely aware of herself, her powers decide to do what they want. It happened twice more before Lincoln suggested it was the sleeping aid she had been taking, and sure enough when she stopped taking them, the small earthquakes ceased. She had also found that for that week her drowsy mind did not see Grant Ward once.

She had sat in the bathroom for hours wrestling with herself. She could keep taking them, get rid of the man who haunted her while she was awake, and deal with her small quakes, or she could dump them into the toilet. They are currently sitting on her bedside table untouched, but close, just in case.

“Right. Forgot.” Is all Coulson says.

The air in the room is thick. She had walked in on something important, something he was hiding from her. Turing around she sees him. Leaning against the same counter as Coulson, almost touching shoulders, and she wonders if he did touch Coulson would he feel it? Arms crossed, standing in the same position as Coulson as though he was actually there. His booted feet crossed over one another, and Daisy wonders if she has seen this before. If maybe this is just a faraway memory of a conversation with the two of them, if the scene in front of her had been played out before.

“Maybe Lincoln can get you a different kind? Something a little less strong?” Coulson suggests.

Daisy just nods again, unsure of how to proceed with her question.

“So…you need some coding done?” Daisy questions him.

Coulson raises an eyebrow realizing that she had been eavesdropping.

“It’s very rude to listen in on other people’s private conversations!” Ward feigns a dramatic scolding, and Daisy has to bite the inside of her chick to keep from laughing.

“I was branching out, I know you’re busy. I didn’t want to bother you with it.”  Coulson says reaching for a new mug above his head, and filling it from a bottle of scotch.

“I’m really not that busy, and it is sorta my job.” Daisy smirks at his flat out lies. “What’s it for? I know I’m coding for this New Zealand mission for Mac, are you running something else?” Daisy questions him as his shoulders tense up and he takes another pull from his mug of amber liquid.

“Just trying to find someone.” Coulson bites back as he grabs some paper work off the table and makes his way towards the door.

The pull to know what he is lying about is too strong. “Who? Who’s so important to find?”

“Watch out, don’t ask questions you don’t truly want the answer to Skye.” Ward warns as he watches Coulson intensely.

“It’s personal Daisy. Nothing for you to worry about.” Coulson shuts her down, before hastily making his way out of the room.

“You need to find out what’s going on Skye.” Ward comments as he suddenly appears beside her, watching Coulson’s back disappear into the dark hallway. “Nothing is ever just work, or just personal when it comes to Coulson. It’s all the same, it’s all personal.”

Daisy winces as the hot tea she is sipping burns her throat on the way down. “Your right. Work and personal are the same here, you taught me that.” She says, walking into the dark hallway towards the deck room.

She can’t help but wonder if this Ward, that she sees in her screwed up mental state, would be there if she turned around- watching her walk away like Grant Ward would always do. Is he there now even if she is not looking? Or does he only appear when she is aware?

It’s when she turns the corner into the deck room that she is hit with more questions because there he sits. Beside her computer, legs propped up top of the desk. He barely glances up as she makes her way to her now cold chair.

After forty minutes of silence aside from her fingers typing on keys, the computer is still running a scan as her cell phone lights up beside her, she gives it a quick glance as her fingers type away on the board. The phone is snatched from the place beside her, Ward flickering past the phone lock and reading the text that had come through. His expression staying well, expressionless.

She tries to focus on the words on the screen in front of her when he starts reading the text out loud. “Baby, I know you can’t sleep and work seems like the best thing right now but it is three a.m and you have a boyfriend lying in your bed who could really use your attention.” Grant says in a mocking tone, “Think you could spare a moment from saving the world?”

Daisy can’t help the small smirk that dances across her face, Lincoln always ended texts with the same line, “Think you could spare a moment from saving the world?”  It doesn’t change that she is still put off with him. His cutes texts won’t change that she knows he is lying to her. Him lying to her won’t change that she wants so desperately to love him as much as he loves her.

Grant huffs, “You think that’s cute? Is your booty calling boyfriend in a frat?”

Daisy expression suddenly loses its smile, “At least he’s not a serial killer!” She bites back as she stands reaching for the phone.

He tucks himself closer into the chair, his arms crossing across his chest. “You sure are moody tonight.”

Daisy says nothing and continues on her work, ignoring Lincoln’s text and Grants harsh gaze. Both hanging heavy on her, both pulling her down into dark water, making her senses confused.

Another thirty minutes pass before Daisy jumps out of her skin, almost completely out of the chair when Grants large hand grasps her wrist mid type. She looks up to meet his dark brown eyes, and the intense look that meets her back sends tingles down her arm, stopping right where his fingers wrap around her wrist.

“Hack Coulson.” He demands his husky voice filled with purpose. “Hack Coulson and don’t let them tell you that whatever is going on is none of your business. It clearly is, and them lying to you is unacceptable.”

Daisy shakes her head, “I can’t do that. I can’t. It violates any kind of trust I have for any of them.”

 Ward scoffs, “You can but you won’t. You need to do this. You deserve to know the truth.”

It was almost funny, the man who lied to her for so long telling her she deserved to know the truth. Could this truth be more dangerous than his truth? Would the outcome be worse than the outcome of Wards lies? Would the truth change her? Change her life? Did it matter? It wasn’t like she had any trust left for anyone.


	4. Like the Sky

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry for how long it took to get this chapter up! Life threw some curve balls and I just was not able to upload. I hope you all enjoy it anyway! Let me know what you think.

The chill that makes its way down her spine causes her whole body to shiver. The sick feeling in the pit of her stomach, the hairs that stand up along her arms, the tears that run down her checks without control, all of these things reminder her that she is alive even though she could equally believe that she was dead.

It’s all suddenly there and she can’t stop clicking, can’t stop reading as her chest feels tight. Newspaper clippings and security footage. Photos and innocent people flash across the screen. Emails between Mac and Coulson. Long black coats and wicked smiles all blend into one, gunshots and men that follow steps behind. Blood covers walls, and no’s become a solid yes with the glint of black, lifeless eyes and foreign powers.

“Skye stop watching this.” The tight voice beside her says but instead her eyes stay glued to the screen in front of her.

Her former S.O elegantly controls the scene. It’s not truly her S.O, she knows that. It’s easy to tell, he carries himself differently than Ward, and his mannerisms are alien- all wrong.  He grasps a man around the throat for a split second before the man drops to the ground, a black smoke swirling in the air from one body to the other. It occurs over and over again, different locations, different people but every situation ends the same way. With this thing that controls her S.O’s body pouring the smoke into them, and as though he had snapped his fingers with a wish they are following him. It’s hypnotic to watch and she does video after video.

Inhuman after inhuman becomes a slave to this thing. This thing. What is it? There’s nothing here on Coulson’s computer that tells her that.  Does Coulson not know? Surely they cannot believe this is Ward. Ward is dead. Coulson put a bullet in him, and left but here he is as clear as day in these videos. Well, his body.

This is what they were keeping from her. Her team, her supposed family! The ones that are supposed to care about her the most. Addresses. She needs addresses, she quickly scribbles with shaking hands before she can completely comprehend what is in front of her let alone what she is doing. It feels as though she is watching her body do things before she is able to catch up.

“The room is shaking Skye. You need to calm down.” An urgent voice says as she pushes him from her mind, wishing him far away from her.

She flings open the hatch to the car garage and it’s only then that she notices the noise behind her. The voices of Fitz and Simmons among the racket of shaking walls, and things crashing to the ground.

“Daisy what is wrong?” Simmons yells as she grasps onto Daisy’s hand.

Daisy yanks back with a knee-jerk reaction only glancing up for a moment at the rows of cars that shake.

She lunges for the keys on the wall, making a beeline for a car.

“Where the hell are ya goin?” Fitz asks as he keeps her from slamming the door shut.

The engine is quietly purring when Fitz meets Daisy’s eyes, and before she can blink she sees the recognition in his eyes, he knows that she knows.

“Did you know?” She growls lowly. It’s rhetorical because she knows that he was in on Coulson’s little secret. Out of the corner of her eye, she sees Lincoln enter the room with Coulson, both rushing her direction.

“Daisy!” Coulson shouts over the group. “You are not to leave this base,” Coulson commands.

Daisy’s hand itches, a deep intense need to step on the gas fills her body.

“Daisy do not fight me on this. Stand down.” Coulson threatens her as his grip lands beside Fitz’s on the door.

She yanks on the door harder, this time, Fitz removes his hand but Coulson only grips tighter with his metal hand. “You lied to me.” Is all she says as Coulson stares at her.

“For your own good Daisy.” He responds with an eye roll, as though she was acting childish, as though she did not understand the situation that he had put them all in.

She lets out a bitter faux laugh, “For my own good?  That’s rich, you of all people do not know what’s good for me. You sure as hell will not command me to stay. I’m clearly no longer a part of this _team_.” She spits the word as though its venom.

“Do not allow him to exploit your weakness!” Coulson slams his fist down on the roof of the car, his frame hunched over to her level.

“Is it Ward?” She asks in a quiet, almost calm voice.

Coulson doesn’t answer her, he just starts to shake his head. “Is that still Grant Ward?” She says a little louder, her hands shaking, the walls shaking.

Coulson’s eyes glance around at the shaking building, and slowly takes his hand off the door, “It’s been confirmed.”

“Daisy don’t go after him.” Lincolns soft voice makes his way around Coulson’s shoulder, his soft blue eyes searching her dark eyes for the right words to say to get her to stay, and she believes that if he searches hard enough he just might find them.

“He’s a monster.” _Those were not the right words._ “You can’t fix him.”

 

* * *

 

 

 Address after address, a list of names and before she can blink she’s staring at a road. Her hands gripping the car wheel as she is going well over the speed limit. It’s like a pull, something deep inside her and she has given up control to it. This thing that is causing her to act before she thinks. All she knows is that she is driving, driving to find answers that this faux family would not give her.   

She knows that she won’t be able to stop until she finds answers. She needs to know what is happening, and she needs to put a stop to it, but she knows deep down that he could be destroying Countries and she wouldn’t be able to take him out, and that probably means she won’t be able to cause harm to whatever is taking control of his body. But, what if it’s him? What if Grant Ward somehow survived, what if this “creature” is really just Ward? What would she do? What will he do? What if she can help him?

* * *

 

_“Pretty sure that drinking alone is bad for your health,” Skye remarks with a smirk as she leans against Ward's motel room door, letting herself in._

_If Ward were a different man he would have smiled back at this girl, her body lazily leaning into the room, her legs bare, covered in only a short night flannel, her hair tossed up into something that could resemble a bird’s nest, the board game Battlefield gracing her arms._

_“I don’t think I should be allowing my S.O to sulk alone.” She tells him with a quick flick of her wrist, getting him to scoot over._

_“I’m not sulking.” He throws a glare her way as he takes another pull of dark liquor from the bottle._

_She quirks an eyebrow and glanced around the dark room. “Yeah, okay.” She says sarcastically, with a small eye roll._

_She looks at her feet that are propped beside his boot covered ones on the bed. “You did what you could Ward. We can’t save them all.” She reminds him, her mind drifting to the young mother Hydra had left cut open in the middle of the little Mexican town square._

_His dark eyes find hers as she reaches for the bottle, bringing it to her lips. The harsh burn of the liquor makes her think that this was a bad idea, coming to comfort him. Maybe she was here because she needed some comforting too._

_“As Agents, we have to learn to deal with events we cannot change.” He says nonchalantly, grabbing the bottle back from her. “You have to decide to not feel what your feeling.”_

_“Right. It’s easier to not feel.” She nods as he runs his tongue over his bottom lip catching a drop of abandoned rum. “But, sometimes I don’t think I can help it. I don’t think I can control not feeling.”_

_She almost jumps when his phone on the bedside table vibrates. Garret's name flashes across the screen and for a moment Skye thinks he’s going to grab the phone, but instead he throws his head back taking another long pull out of the bottle._

_Ward shakes the whole bed as he toes off his boots, they make a thud as they hit the ground, and Skye is almost shocked when he gets up to pull the comforter back just enough to slip under it, Skye follows suit._

_They lie there until Skye has lost track of time, both silently passing the rum bottle back and forth until it’s empty. Their shoulders barely touch, but the thin comforter holds in their body heat tight._

_She lays her head back against the thin pillow, noticing the ceiling painted with blue and white clouds. She tilts her head a tad, her eyes gazing over the different designs that her own motel room lacked._

_“Why do you get the pretty ceiling?” She questions with a small smile, glancing at him to find his eyes already on her._

_His brown eyes search for something in hers, and for a split second she fears that maybe he wouldn’t find whatever it is._

_“Pretty, like the sky.” He says gently as his head turns forward, his eyes resting on the ceiling. “Like Skye.” He mumbles once more that night before the silence wraps around them again._

_“What are you thinking about?” She asks quietly as she pulls her eyes open, turning her head in his direction._

_She could practically feel his energy, his mind constantly working. It was basically another body lying between them, his thoughts._

_“I’m…I’m thinking about how we should be evaluating tomorrow.” Is his simple, calculated reply._

_Skye realizes that every time she thinks she is breaking down the invisible wall between them that he built, they are really only knocking down a brick. That wall is still intact, and he is not being open with her. She knows it will take time, but she knows that one day she will get so that all she has to do is walk past the wreckage of those walls. She knows that one day he will stop shutting her out._

_“One of these late nights Grant Ward, your gonna stop shutting me out.” She confesses softly into the dark room._

_He snickers quietly under his breath, “I’m not sure you want me to do that.”_

_She shakes her head slightly, “You’re a good man Ward, and one day I’m gonna prove that to you.”_

_It would be professional to leave, to not get comfortable, and to have not shown up at his door in the first place but she can’t bring herself to get up. She almost feels awkward because she doesn’t feel awkward, she doesn’t feel like she doesn’t belong at his side. She doesn’t leave, and her eyelids so slowly fall after she reaches for his hand, his tight clutch engulfing hers._

_It’s in the middle of the night when he rolls her way that she is shaken awake into a weird space of half sleep. He slips his large arm around her waist and pulls her in closer. His chin resting on her shoulder, his breath hitting her neck. It’s not enough, she can’t help but think. It’s one thing to tell yourself not to feel, it’s another thing to actually be able to not feel. It’s not easy to feel safe in this world but right here tucked into his side she feels safe, but a small part of her mind keeps nagging at her, trying to tell her that those feelings are wrong._

* * *

 

“You shouldn’t be doing this.” Ghost Ward tells her as he suddenly appears in the seat beside her, jaw prickled with stubble, black baseball cap atop his head.

It had been hours since she left, two stolen cars later and the farther she drove the more she felt it. This intense pull, the one in the pit of her soul telling her she made the right decision to leave the base.

“Skye!” He says louder this time causing her to glance at the passenger seat once more. “Where are you going?”

She looks out at the two-way highway and the miles of never-ending road in front of her, the car yanks forward and suddenly one hundred miles an hour isn’t fast enough. “I’m going to go find him.” She informs him, “The thing wearing your body.”

“You just left Cassie back there.” He reminds Daisy. “She depends on you, and you didn’t even hesitate before you left her to go on a ghost hunt.”

He was right. Cassie had not crossed Daisy’s mind once as she stormed out in anger. Daisy felt bad, she really did. She just left that girl who was her responsibility there in a place she had taken her to.  “Everyone has to learn to get by on their own. She’ll be fine, she’s stronger than she looks. I’ll go back for her.”

He looks at her as though she has lost her mind, but the difference between him and everyone else is that he understands why she is acting the way she is. “You say that like you are never going to go back.”

Mile marker 784 passed her at a speed so fast she almost didn’t see it, and the Mountain View would be beautiful if she could focus on it. “I don’t think they will welcome me back, not after this.”

“That’s your home Skye, they will welcome you back.”

“Maybe I don’t want them to.” She whispers, her words misting the air and leaving a strange feeling in her mouth.

Ward doesn’t say much after that, and she smirks at his silence. If she drives for six more hours she can catch a flight to Bali. That’s where this thing was the last seen, making camp with a few minions working on some unknown plan. According to Coulson’s files, this thing was searching out an inhuman by the name of Dominic Ruse. Of course, Coulson has no idea what his inhuman abilities are but she supposed she would find out.

“You’re tired Skye.” He tells her as she pulls out of a small gas station in the middle of nowhere. “What are you gonna do? Run yourself exhausted to go find…my body?”

“You’re the one that wanted me to hack Coulson. Find out what he was hiding.” She reminds him.

Her hand tightens on the wheel as his hand wraps around her wrist. She still takes a moment to recognize that the man that is sitting beside her is dead, but somehow she is still able to feel him. It sends her mind off into a whole different place.

“I didn’t think you would find something like this and I sure as hell didn’t think you would just leave the base.” She quickly yanks her hand out of his grasp, keeping her eyes on the hazy road, and adjusting the baseball cap that she just bought at the corner store.

“Well, I didn’t think you were Hydra but here we are with our poor judgment.” She snarls back at him.

He simply shakes his head, pulling the cap from his head placing it on the dash. “I hope you know what you’re doing. I don’t want your poor judgment to get you killed.”

Her breathing comes out unevenly and for a small moment, she fears the ground might be shaking. “Yours got you killed.”

 

* * *

 

_“Are you eating?” She asks reluctantly as she crosses her arms over her chest settling into her metal chair._

_He watches her like a predator. Had he always watched her like that? Had she overlooked it? Had his eyes always been so dark? Somewhere in the back of her mind, she wonders if she was a bad person for thinking he looked so good with a beard? Is she a bad person for still wanting to drown in those dark brown eyes?_

_It’s about the fifth time she had been down here to visit him. She was the one sent to communicate with the Hydra psychopath because he would only talk to her because she was so unlucky. Because this man in front of her knows her and it's almost scary how well. That’s all these little interrogations have shown her, is how well he knows her._

_“It’s so sweet of you to worry about my health.” He says sarcastically as he grips his chest._

_She rolls her eyes as she looks to the scar on his wrist. “Coulson wanted to make sure that I ask.”_

_He laughs under his breath, “So Coulson is the one worried. Scared his intel might starve to death.”  He runs a hand over his check, “I see they denied my request for Whiskey.”_

_The longer she looks at the jagged scar that runs along his wrist the more the ache in her chest makes itself known._

_“Where was Hydra’s main base in London?” She asks as she looks down at the list of questions Coulson had sent with her._

_He sits down on his bed, shaking his head. “They would never tell me that. Too important.”_

_“I denied your request for Whiskey. Not important enough.” Her eyes flicker up to glare at him, her jaw set tightly._

_He smiles at her, his whole face lighting up. “You shouldn’t be drinking it alone, I was once told its bad for your health.”_

_She clears her throat looking at the list, the words on it not really registering in her mind. This was why she hated coming down here, two things can happen. She can either lose control of her anger, and the ground will start shaking or she stumbles. His presence causes her to too much pain. She would be lying if she said she didn’t miss him. Miss the man he had made her think he was._

_“Where was Garret's infiltration team stationed?” She questions him, glancing back to the paper with her script on it._

_“What happened to your chin?” He asks suddenly and her hand reaches for the cut that lays diagonally across her jaw._

_“Fucking Hydra agent. He got a little too close.” She instantly regrets saying it. Coulson had told her not to mention their recent attack but here she is letting it all slip._

_It throws her though when he barely takes an interest, just nodding along to her answer._

_“Do you believe in happy endings Skye?” The smile gracing his face is enough to make her ignore him._

_She keeps her gaze on him just long enough to feel her heart rate escalate. His footsteps are silent, he moves across the room as though he is an animal hunting, his dark eyes filled with a new found confidence._

_“I know you do. I know I do.” He smirks at her as he runs his hand right over the space of the invisible prison wall. It slowly lights up with his motions._

_Grant Ward was almost a different person while locked down here. His motions all stayed uncalculated, he was natural but not comfortable. Nothing was thought out beforehand, and it almost made him seem more dangerous._

_“Since you seem to be having a hard time today, why don’t I just take over on the questioning?” He shrugs, “Do they know? The team?” He questions her, keeping his voice a little higher than normal._

_She doesn’t want to but she takes the bait, “Do they know what?” She asks a little aggressively._

_He stands right in front of her, placing his hands on his side. “How to close you were to your S.O.” He clarifies. “That the cold-blooded killer in front of you knows you on an intimate level.”_

_She stands quickly, the chair scraping the bottom of the floor, all of the air in the room suddenly turns cold. Her curled fist aches to make contact with his face. “You son of a bitch, they know how intimate my gun is with you.”_

_“Does Coulson know?” He questions her again, this time, a little more aggressively, “Did you confess all your sins to the holy Coulson?”_

_“Did you tell Garret?” She throws the question back at him, “Would your courageous leader be disappointed in you if he found out?”_

_Ward smirks at her for fighting back, “Garrett knew that you awoke a weakness inside me, he saw that. He saw just how much you meant to me, he saw how compromising that was for the mission.”_

_She bites her lip, reminding herself that she is the one in charge here. She has a job, she is here to get information on Hydra. She keeps her eyes on the piece of paper in front of her but can feel him pacing back and forth in the cell._

_“Common Skye, tell me. Did you spill all your secrets to Coulson about us? Does he know that you got so close to a Hydra agent?”_

_“Where was the team stationed?” She asks coldly, her voice monotone._

_He smiles at her reaction, getting just what he wanted. “Well, fuck me then papa Coulson doesn’t know all your deep dark secrets.”_

_Her chest pounds, and to see him standing there tall, calm makes her even angrier. “My dark secrets don’t make me a Nazi. They don’t make me an evil psychopath who infiltrated this team! I am not the Hydra agent in this room!” She roars at him._

_“Does it make you a liar?” His eyes hold hers, a sparkle to them. “I might be evil but it doesn’t change the feelings that are still there between us.”_

_“Where was the team stationed?” Her eyes meet his, causing him to pause in his pacing._

_He feels the electricity that runs between them, it might be littered with hateful misunderstanding and it might hold a lot of resentment but it is mostly filled with longing. He knows that she feels it too, that surge between them but knows she will deny it until she is blue in the face just to prove him wrong._

_“Hydra doesn’t station. It’s all done on a random basis, no one knows where until the team is needed.” He bites back at her._

_Daisy has disbelief written all over her face, and he sees that. “That sounds like a bullshit answer.”_

_Ward simply looks at her, “It’s the truth. I’ll only ever tell you the truth.” He vows. “I made you a promise.” He reminds her once again, it never fails that he reminds her every time she comes down here._

_“You and I we really coulda been something you know, still, could.” He tells her, his large rough hands drifting over the barrier wall, causing the red light to appear under his fingertips. “I miss you, Skye.”_

_She backs away from the wall as he gets closer, his voice getting lower with each word. She grabs the chair and flings it into the far back wall, heading for the stairs._

_“Goodbye Ward.” She growls under her breath._

_“Oh, and Skye!” He yells at her, she turns only slightly. “I wouldn’t stick up my nose at some Brandi.”_

_She slams the door so hard her arm aches, his taunting chuckles follow her down the hall._


	5. Eyes of a monster

 

 

She keeps her head down, her baseball cap covering most of her face. She had made it through security without a hitch, and she was making her way quickly to the terminal with her small bag slung over her shoulder. She had been worried that her bloodshot eyes and shaking hands would make her look suspicious but she would have thought that Coulson would have her on a no-fly list. But, no one gave her a second glance. It was almost too easy, and that made her even more nervous.

As she boards the redeye flight to Bali she takes a deep inhale and is thankful that the plane is only a quarter full, leaving her in an aisle alone. The flight isn’t long, she almost welcomes the time in the air before landing to go find this thing. She totes in a stolen laptop and clothes picked up from a minute mart.

Take off is smooth, and right away she pulls out her stolen laptop. A family with smiling children grace the screen. They all have smiles on their faces, and a middle-aged couple look at each other over the children’s heads. That’s what normal people look like, she thinks. That’s what a family looks like.

The main internet page is littered with news reports, Captain America, America’s true enemy. She can’t help the little laugh that escapes her lips, well son of a bitch. Look at that.

“Coulson is probably having an aneurysm.” Ward remarks from his seat beside her.

She pulls up S.H.I.E.L.D.S home drive almost right away, with little effort. Hell, she is the one that monitors the security, it’s part of her job to know how to get into the back door of the system. Multiple things had happened since Daisy had left base, one of them being a correspondence between Coulson and May. May and Mac have orders to go to Bali, and Coulson is staying at base, tracking whatever this is they are going after. An artifact maybe? Daisy is a little unsure, it could be Asgardian, but it could be something else. Nothing about her though, and that seemed a little odd. Coulson would know she would hack into the system but then why let her know that May and Mac are in Bali?

Her hands haven’t stopped the slight shaking since she shook the base. That had been at least eight hours, eight hours of shaking hands. She closes her eyes and prays to whoever is up there that she can make it through the flight without causing something awful to happen.

“Do your hands usually shake this long?” Ward asks her as he sits beside her in the dimly lit plane.

She shakes her head slightly, just enough so he will see it and the flight attendant won’t think she’s talking to herself…even though she is talking to the Ghost of a man who might not be dead, but appears in her mind most often. She places her head against the window, looking out into the pitch black darkness and she can’t help but wonder if that’s all that is waiting for her, darkness.

“Coulson said they had confirmed it to be me…” Ward whispers to himself, “But Lincoln said I was evil. I was a monster before, how could I be any worse than that?” His voice hurts her, even though he is just in her head, even though his nerves are just her nerves, and his hurt is her hurt. “I thought I was finally at peace.”

She almost laughs, because it would seem that Grant Ward would never allow her to have peace, no matter what form he was in.

 

 

* * *

 

_“Grants really_ taken _with_ you. _” Jemma mentions one day as they sit in the lab going over data samples._

_Skye snorts, “I’m not sure I would say that. I think I bug him just a bit too much.”_

_Jemma’s goggled framed eyes_ roll, _but keep working. It’s Fitz from across the room that adds to Jemma’s claims. “He isn’t like that with other people. Only a select few souls are gifted with Grant Ward's feelings. You’re one of them now.” Fitz doesn’t glance up once from his microscope._

_Skye shrugs the comment off, He cannot stand me._

_“Welcome to the very small club of people Grant Ward would take a bullet for.” Jemma congratulates her with a full, bright smile._

_“Do we at least get t-shirts?” Skye jokes while returning Jemma’s smile and throwing a pencil across the room at Fitz._

_“I’m still trying to figure out what font to use on them.”_

_Skye turns her head quickly, behind her stands Ward leaning against the door arms across his firm chest, a smirk gracing his face, eyes on her._

_She grins up at him almost in embarrassment for being caught talking about him. “We should figure that out soon, I would sleep in mine every night.”_

_“So would I.” Fitz laughs, still not glancing up._

_Skye meets Ward's eyes again and that’s the first time that she realizes that Fitzsimmons was right. Ward did care for her, and she would be lying if she said she didn’t care for him._

 

* * *

 

She jerks awake on the plane, her whole body feeling as though she was falling through thin air. The words Hail Hydra fill her head, and she feels like she might be sick. The turbulence is harsh, and fasten seat belts signs go off, and flight attendants yell at passengers. She grips the edges of her seat, and watches as a few pieces of luggage fall out of the overhead.

“Daisy.” His voice is quiet but close to her ear.

She looks to her right and meets his eyes. The dark chocolate color that seems to calm her instantly. The eyes of a monster, the eyes of the man who destroyed her life- those are the eyes that she finds solace in.

“You fell asleep without your belt on.” He informs her, reaching for the belt laying open across her lap. However, the turbulence stops and she instantly realizes that was her. She was causing the plane to shake. Another six hours till landing.

She makes her way to the small bathroom, splashing herself with some cold water in the face and glances into the mirror. Dark circles decorate her eyes, and for a minute she questions this. Everything is wrong, what if she’s just chasing a beast. What does she want from this? It’s not like she can save him, she had failed the first time.

 

* * *

 

_It happens soon after she first kisses him, a feeling. It’s not a good feeling, it's not any feeling she had felt about Grant Ward before. It’s…a_ tingle _in her gut, telling her something is wrong. Telling her something is lurking behind those dark eyes, and strong, firm exterior. Her gut tells her that dark glimmer in his eyes should make her want to flee, but then it’s_ gone, _like a flame is put out and his smile replaces it._

_She puts it_ into _the back of her mind. He has a dark past, one he doesn’t want to talk about, so does she. He’s done things, things that have changed him, so has she. She convinces herself that that glimmer is the_ past, _and not the future._

_It’s worse than she had ever imagined. Hail Hydra._


	6. Midnight phone calls

It was a personal attack, Hydra had become one of her most personal enemies. Turns out that Hydra takes form as her person, as _the_ person whose smile will forever haunt her mind. Hydra had gotten to her in a way she never thought they would, their evil had crept into her life like a virus and stolen away something that had never been real. They had infiltrated her and the team, and all the questions she had never really got answers. Hydra had been playing them, looking for a way to break them. Turns out they didn’t break anything, except for her. And the longer she sat here, the more she realized that Hydra was probably behind this in some way too. Once again here, and fucking up her life.

She watches them from a distance, tucked into the dark night behind a large box van. The van is owned by the senior cleaning lady that had come home around 6pm and left her van parked out on the street. Daisy had silently thanked the woman for not bothering to pull her car up further into the driveway because it gave her the perfect vantage point to watch the large warehouse across the street and down a slight hill from the long street of colorful row houses.

Coulson had left a rather easy to find an email for her to discover on May’s mission whereabouts. He was sending the team here, to go after this Grant Ward figure. To take him down, and conveniently left the email for Daisy to see, she wasn’t too keen on how Coulson had just left it laying out in the open for her.

Her legs ached from crouching for such a long period of time, but she kept silent, waiting for anything to happen. The air was hot, thick and humid and felt as though it was sticking to her skin. No movement had come from the warehouse for almost two hours, and it looked as though it was staying pretty silent, her stakeout partner had been pretty chatty, however.

It had started with talking her through getting off the plane. He didn’t like how she refused to take a cab and scowled at her for breaking into a motel room. It was easier that way, she left no more of a trace than she had to. No one needed to know she was in Bali, so no one would see her.

“Are we waiting for the sun to come up, and have breakfast with the cleaning lady?” Ghost Ward teased her as he sat stick sill in the same position he had been in since squatting down.

She didn’t say anything, but rather threw an annoyed eye roll in his direction.

He chuckles, and looks back to the warehouse. “Coulson has to know that you would have found the mission report, he has to know that you're here.” He tells her, “The mission is probably to bring you back in, not find the thing with my body.”

She doesn’t respond and glances behind her when the lights that had been illuminating the sidewalk go out, the cleaning lady had gone to bed.

He leans closer to her then, and the wind picks up, as though the world was suddenly coming alive. She tucks her black flannel around her body tighter along with her leather jacket.

She can no longer feel her legs, and her nose is so cold is running from the chill when Grant suddenly jumps up. “I see movement.”

She looks around then, her body becoming alerted again. Past the chain-link fence surrounding the warehouse five men, all pretty large in size come out of the warehouse, none of them wear the face of Grant Ward.  They are all armed it clear to see as they all hold a large gun to their sides. The flicker of the street light above them makes the scene easy to view from her vantage point, and she sits in blackness on her side of the street.

It's then that the low rumble of trucks is heard, followed by two large black SUV’s pulling past the gate and up to the men. Daisy tries pulling herself as far behind the Van as she can, staying hidden while watching the scene before her.

Two figures emerge from the SUV and she has to hold her breath as she watches a young boy gets out followed by a tall, bulky figure dawning a long black leather trench coat that flutters in the wind. It too dark she realizes as she strains her eyes trying to see what’s happening on the other side of the road.

They all stand in a circle, talking it would seem for a few minutes before the young girl is pulled into the building. The figure in the long coat stays behind in the dark parking lot as the rest of the people go back inside.

“That’s him.” Ghost Ward says in a quiet somber voice as he stares out at the same scene.

Daisy watches the figure curiously, daring the figure to turn towards her and he does. He turns his entire body in her direction, standing and tilting his head, looking right at her. If he sees her she doesn’t know, doesn’t know how he would in the pitch black of her side of the street. But he just stares and she can practically feel his eyes on her.

She lets out the breath she didn’t realize she had been holding when he turns towards the warehouse, and goes inside, the heavy sound of the metal door slamming echoed down the street.

“That’s my body.” Ghost Ward says besides her, looking at the empty parking lot across the street.

 

* * *

 

_Two very important things happened the day that Coulson sent SkyeWard on a mission into Hydra territory. Grant had knocked on Skye’s door and Skye had killed a man._

_The mission had been simple, Skyeward infiltrate a Hydra base that would have a minimum amount of armed men and Skye would hack into their database once inside. However, it didn’t go that way exactly. They had been sent in with no backup and once they were past the hotel doors no one would have been able to successfully get to them anyway._

_They hadn’t planned on the Hydra agents being so prepared for their arrival, as though they had been tipped off. They were barely able to make it into the base before Ward was taken out by a large agent. The man hit them from behind, and Ward took a blow to the head. Skye struggled with the man putting up a fight until another came along and put a gun to Wards temple, and she was pulled along behind as they drug Ward into a basement._

_It was there that they started questioning her, chaining Ward to a pipe._

_“Fucking S.H.I.E.L.D scum!” The large muscular man barked at her as he gripped her jaw in his meaty hands. “Tell me how did you learn of our base here?” He asks while running a gun down the side of her face._

_An echo fills the room and Skye turns her gaze to the man standing over Ward, fists at his side and blood running down Ward’s nose. “I bet it was this jackass. He has the intel we are looking for.”_

_When Grant finally comes to, the men take turns bruising his face, demanding answers. When Skye can’t take the sound of Grant’s painful groans anymore she speaks up from her place struggling against the third man._

_“He doesn’t know anything!” She practically screams while Grant chokes up a little bit of blood._

_Both men turn towards her as they started to laugh. The large man with the huge nose makes his way towards her, speckles of Grant's blood on his shirt. She cringes when he touches her cheek, still silently laughing to himself._

_“Don’t put a fucking hand on her!” Ward growls in a broken voice from the ground._

_“I have a feeling that Grant Ward knows much more than you think he does.” The man whispers to her, “But I see now why he acts as though he doesn’t.” He winks at her before exiting the room with the other man, leaving Skye to be thrown carelessly to the floor by the third._

_They had no one, with no back up on a mission they might not come home from. So when Skye noticed the gun in the man’s waistband as he turned away from her, she grabbed for it and before she could even blink pulled the trigger. They had both nearly died, and they would have if she hadn’t had put a bullet in that Hydra agents skull- and then the other two after that. But that didn’t change that her eyes had watered as the first man’s body hit the floor and that her hands started shaking afterward. Grant looked at her from his place on the floor, his face beaten and bloody with eyes that didn’t let her know if he was disgusted or proud, maybe even a little of both._

_She had showered as soon as they got back to the bus. Scrubbing her skin so hard that it became red and raw, and standing under the scolding hot water she was finally able to wrap her mind around her actions. She had killed a man. She was no different than anyone else, she hadn’t even blinked before putting a bullet in a man’s skull for her mission- to save the life of herself and her SO. She scrubbed harder. She was disgusted with herself because she had never wanted to be a killer- no matter the reason behind it._

_Standing in her room wrapped in a towel staring at her reflection. She looks completely the same as she had when she had awoken that morning aside from the bruises covering her jaw, and decorating her arms but she felt different._

_It’s staring at her reflection that she hears the light tap on her door, and before she can reply it’s slowly pushed open. On the other side of the door is Grant Ward, also decorated in bruises of his own. Unlike Skye he hadn’t showered, his shirt still stained with blood. He was coming to check on her, to make sure she was okay when he was the one who had been almost beaten to a bloody pulp._

_She doesn’t turn towards him instead simply watched through the mirror as he softly closed the door behind him and stood to watch her. Waiting for her to make the first move, looking as though he had something to say._

_Skye doesn’t let him talk though because when she turns around his dark eyes meet hers and they only convey her self-doubt, the aftermath of her actions written across her face. She doesn’t regret saving his life, and she doesn’t think she ever will but that doesn’t change that her actions have changed who she is as a person forever. Hydra had infected her with their evil, with their hate._

_“Make me forget.” She tells him, searching his eyes for an answer to the heavy weight on her chest._

_She doesn’t know then that all she was asking for was an undercover Hydra agent to help her forget the hate that he had helped place into her heart. She didn’t realize that her feelings of belonging where with an undercover agent who was going to ruin her life. All Skye knew was that he made her forget, and made her feel like she belonged in his arms for the rest of her life._

_Before she can get her full request out he is making his way across the room, his presence filling the entire area. His dark eyes met hers for a moment before placing his hands on her cheeks and pulling her lips to his. He pulled her body into his own as though she was oxygen and God she had felt like she needed him more than anything. Hydra had almost gotten to them, Hydra had almost killed them both without a second thought, and she needed to be reminded that she was alive._

_He pressed her back against the mattress and held her hands above her head. He kissed every inch of her body and she didn’t feel any shame in moaning as loud as she could. He had worshiped her in a slow and loving way. Skye quickly learned that one of her favorite things was the way Grant's lips felt against her skin and the way he breathed against her ribs._

_It was what Skye needed, she needed to make herself believe that she had killed that man so that they could survive so that Hydra wouldn’t win. When she looked down at him, sweaty and breathing heavy beneath her she knew that she had done the right thing._

_As his large hands covered her thighs and she gripped Grant as though her body was melting into his, she had no idea that Hydra had gotten closer to her than they ever had before all because they had set up a fake base, with fake intel. That was the first night that Skye let herself drown in Grant Ward and all of his lies, and it wouldn’t be the last._

* * *

 

Daisy doesn’t watch him long but she watches long enough to get goosebumps. He looks like her former SO, and from this distance, anyone would have thought that it was him but then every once and a while he does things that Grant Ward would never have done- like the dramatic flick of the wrist or cock of a hip.

He eventually follows the other men inside, and Daisy almost thinks it would be a good time to sneak off except her watch blinks with a silent timer, and she glances at her wrist just enough to notice something else off in the distance.

On the other side of the street is a car that had not been there an hour ago, and she knows that when she turns around someone will be there. May’s there.

She’s sitting on the steps leading up to the cleaning ladies front door. Predatory and cat-like. Silent and Daisy can't help but wonder how long she had just been sitting there watching Daisy watch this thing that has Ward's body.

“New mission?” Daisy smirks at May, moving to stand up- her knee makes a popping noise.

May stays in her spot, casually glancing down at her nails as though Daisy was not right in front of her. “You are in way over your head,” May says in a calculated way, her eyes looking past Daisy to the van and back to her nails.

Daisy put a hand on her hip and silently smirks to herself. “I am floating above the water. I’m just fine, but glad to see Coulson still cares.”

“It's not just Coulson who is worried about you. It's all of us. Me, Simmons, Lincoln- you remember him right? Your boyfriend.”

Daisy takes a deep breath, trying to keep her heart rate down. “I am only trying to find answers as to what Coulson has been keeping from me.” Daisy informs her, “Do you know what that thing is?”

May stands quickly, “I know that you are taking your feelings and placing them into a situation that does not need them. I know that whatever that thing down there is, it is not the dead former undercover Hydra agent Grant Ward. It’s something darker, something that we have not yet encountered but it is something we should all fear.”

Daisy stands her ground, not moving when May advances towards her. The two women stand for a moment, looking at one another, both wondering how they have found themselves on opposite sides.

“Are you here to bring me in May?” Daisy finally questions her SO.

May shakes her head, “I’m not here to hurt you, Daisy. I’m here to watch that thing, and try to talk some sense into you before you get yourself killed.”

“If you’re not here to take me in then I’m gonna have to say goodbye.” Daisy declares before silently slinking her way across the street, and over the high chain link fence.

When she turns back to look May is gone, disappeared into the night.

“She is right ya know?” Ghost Ward says as she looks around at her new surroundings, “There looks like a back door on the left side of the building.” He comments, following her around the large building in the dark.

“She’s right, that you are putting too many emotions into this. It's your weakness Skye, you need to fight that weakness so that you don’t end up dead.” Ward says with sad eyes.

The door isn't locked, and it doesn’t squeak as she slips through it, only darkness waiting on the other side.

* * *

 

_After he escapes from the team he calls her more than a handful of times. She knows she should say something to the team about it but she can’t bring herself to and it pisses her off. It pisses her off that she still feels enough for him that she won’t tell Coulson that he’s calling, for fear of Coulson learning of Ward's whereabouts. She hates this man, she should hate him enough to send someone after him- she should want to go after him and he does but no enough._

_She curses herself as she looks down at her phone, Unknown Number flashes across the screen at three a.m._

_“What do you want?” Her voice is dry with sleep, the cup on her bedside table empty._

_She can hear his low chuckle from over the phone, “Are you in your apartment?”_

_She knows that he knows the answer to his question. “What do you want?”_

_Her feet pad through the carpet into the kitchen to fill a glass with water to cure her dry throat. The water almost burns it so cold going down her throat._

_“Why haven’t you told Coulson that I’m calling you, I mean hell your keeping some pretty important information about a top Hydra agents whereabouts from them.” His voice fades in and out slightly, he’s clearly doing something else while talking to her. “You’re not supposed to keep information from the team, right?”_

_She doesn’t answer him right away because he is once again asking questions he knows the answers to. He knows that she is struggling with how she feels about him, he knows she feels weak because of it._

_“I don’t know where you are, would you like to tell me?” She pipes back, leaning into the counter setting her glass down._

_“Oh Skye, I’ve told you over and over again where I’m at, you just aren’t listening hard enough.” His voice floats with ease as though this conversation is supposed to be casual._

_“I’m not playing a game here Ward. Where are you?” She growls into the phone, running a finger in a circle around the sleek countertop._

_“It’s not a game Skye. I’m just calling to talk to you.” The honesty in his voice makes her chest jerk, and she closes her eyes. “How are you? Are you still having pain in your shoulder?”_

_Lincoln wants a relationship, the pain in her shoulder still hasn’t gone away. She wants to tell him these things, and she hates herself for it. Loathes her feelings, and loathes him for making her feel this way._

_She doesn’t answer him, and the line stays silent until he clears his throat. “Are you going to answer my question, Skye? Why have you not mentioned our phone calls to Coulson?”_

_Because I am not a good person, she thinks. “Maybe I have told Coulson. You don’t know that I haven’t.”_

_She hears the sound of a loud engine on the other end of the call, it’s a little too loud, though. She walks over to her kitchen window glancing out onto the main street. A black SUV sits across the street, a dark menacing shadow cast across the dark street._

_“I know you haven’t told him, he would have made a move by now. That’s the thing about Coulson, he wants to kill me more than you do.” She can hear movement on the other end, but cannot see anyone around the SUV._

_“Maybe we both just want to kill you in different ways.” She whispers as she reaches into a kitchen drawer keeping her eyes on the SUV. The metal hits her fingertips and she finally releases the breath she didn’t know she had been holding._

_He laughs in response but doesn’t respond to her harsh comment. “Where are you, Ward?” She questions him again._

_Grant’s breathing can be heard, and as though it happens in slow motion Skye watches as a figure opens the door and steps out of the SUV. She doesn’t need daylight to know that it’s him, she can feel that it’s him._

_“I like those pajamas.” He breathes into the phone, the figure making its way across the street._

_She grips the gun tighter, but it’s not out of fear of him. “How long have you been out there?” It’s out of fear of how he makes her feel._

_“Oh, Skye. Who says it’s me?” He questions her judgment like she questioned his._

_“Its you.”_

_“You should call Coulson. I’m right here, he can get me.” The figure disappears from her fifth story window._

_A few moments pass and Skye grips the gun so hard she loses feeling in her fingertips._

_“But you won’t.” He asks her, “That weakness Skye, it’s something you and I share.”_

_She knows he has to be on the third floor by now, he doesn’t sound out of breath and that means he is casually taking the stairs. She has at least another minute before he reaches her floor, and opens the door at the end of the hall._

_“We don’t share anything, Ward.” Her voice cracks at little, and she prays that he doesn’t notice. “I hate you.” Her voice doesn’t convey the feelings she wants it to anymore, she just sounds tired._

_“I have a bottle of Jack, and I don’t think I can drink it alone.”_

_She hears the echo of the door at the end of the hallway close, he’s making his footsteps loud as they fall and her heart beats so fast that she looks down at her wrist, but doesn’t have her watch on._

_“Do not come through that door, Grant.” She whispers, her left hand starting to shake as his footsteps come to a stop outside the door._

_She quietly walks toward the door, the light under it covered by two shoes. The gun has forgotten on the counter._

_“If I didn’t want your permission I would have come in hours ago.” His voice is gritty, threatening. “But, I don’t want another bullet lodged into my side.”_

_Her chest heaves, “Then do not come through that door.”_

_Skye’s whole body tenses as the light thump of three knocks come from the other side of the door._

_The part of herself that she hates longs for her to open it. To see his face, his dark eyes, and to feel his hands, to drown herself in his warmth._

_“Will you shoot me, Skye? If I walk through the door.” He asks, almost teasingly._

_To save him from this hell. To save the both of them from this wicked life they are living. To forgive him for all of it. To forget it all and wake up surrounded by him in the morning._

_“Yes.” Her tear filled eyes look at the shadow of his feet waiting for him to leave._

_But he doesn’t. He stands outside her door, and the tears in her eyes fall down her face, dripping onto her chest. Ward might be the worst kind of evil she has come face to face with but she knows he won’t walk through that door without her telling him its okay, and she knows she should call Coulson. Call the good guys to come get the bad guy, but she can’t make her feet move._

_“What are you thinking?” She asks him around the tears because it’s the question that she always wants to ask him because she always wants to know what he’s thinking._

_“One day you’ll let me in. You’ll understand. This weakness is not ours to do nothing with.” His voice fills her apartment, and then she listens to his breathing. “One day you will stop running from us.”_

_“I- I cannot forgive you, Grant.” She wipes the tears from her cheeks, taking a deep breath._

_“I love you, Skye.” His voice is barely above a whisper, his voice is strong and rough. “I need you to believe me, Skye.”_

_She stands there with her eyes closed. She knows she knows he loves her and maybe that’s why she can’t shoot him. Because when she found out he was Hydra he tore a hole in her heart. He tugged so hard at her that he broke her, and she hates him for that but it doesn't change that she wishes for anything more than his arms around her despite it all._

_When she opens the door he is gone, and the phone call has ended._

 

 


	7. Before it's too late

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, I know it has been way too long! But life threw some things my way like a car accident and a switch of meds and it seemed that no amount of m&m's and tea was going to allow me to write. But over the past week I have felt better and I wanted to get this out to you as soon as possible. So please accept my apology for being a really shitty updater!
> 
> Also AOS better not be teasing us with this Grant Ward, we better get a really incredible story before they get rid of him again. 
> 
> Enjoy.

It's pitch black down the long halls of the empty building and she breathes deeply as she feels the goosebumps appeared on her skin. She moves slowly, as softly as she can but ends up cursing herself every time her footfalls echo.  Her hand follows the wall as she walks blindly in the dark, her other hand gripped tight on her gun.

“There is no way this is a good idea, Skye.” Ward says behind her, and she ignores him.

She wishes him away to whatever part of her mind he was born from, to the darkest place in her mind and suddenly he’s silent and she can’t sense him anymore.

Her hand hits something, a slight bump in the wall. She carefully skims her fingers over the wood, clipping her gun to her side. A door. She searches for the handle in the dark, her hands frantic. Just as she finds the metal knob it turns without warning, and a bright light floods the darkness as the door opens.

“Well, well, well…” The loud familiar voice booms.

She’s not really sure what happened at that moment when she suddenly couldn’t tell her feet to move when her brain screamed at her to reach for her gun but no matter how much she screamed at herself to move, she simply stood there. Bright lights flickered on behind her, their glare causing her to squint her eyes. A deer in headlights waiting for the impact of the vehicle to kill her.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                           

* * *

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  

 

 

_She sits in a random coffee house in Boston, her laptop sits on the wooden table and her coffee has gone cold. May had left her to her own devices and the team was off doing God only knows what. Daisy had left the hotel room sometime around 6 am every intention of sitting down with a nice cup of coffee, some extremely bad coffee house wi-fi and a queue of forgotten Netflix shows. It had been almost six weeks since Ward escaped. Her whole body hurts from May’s extreme training as she walked in the cold morning air, rain tapping against her hood and she tugged her bag higher on her shoulder as she passed large groups of early morning commuters._

_The intense smell of espresso surrounds her and for one second she feels like herself. Well, how she used to be before all of this. The hacker who slept in her van and spent cold days in coffee houses, the girl who had no idea who she was, or where she came from. The girl who wasn’t an S.H.I.E.L.D agent…_

_But there she was, coffee steaming and earphones ready when a man walked in. It wasn’t anything he said or anything he did really but he held himself in a familiar way. One that screamed that he was everything her team was trying to take down, an air followed him around- a warning sign to his prey. And as he ordered his drink and grossly flirted with the barista who was clearly underage, Daisy cringed. As he stood waiting on his drink Daisy felt it, that itch that was so intense she couldn’t help but scratch it- like she was some sort of addict dying for a hit. She needed to find them, and Hydra didn’t take lazy days to watch Netflix- but hell she was lying to herself, this wasn’t really about Hydra. Grant Ward doesn’t take days off to watch Netflix and that’s really the only thing that mattered._

_“Here is your four shot Brock!”_

_When the young girl had called out his name, with his espresso he had smirked and thanked the girl with a creepy, “Thanks, dollface.” Daisy heard him as he moved his way across the floor, his black combat boots making his footfalls standout against the coffee house music playlist._

_For a split second, she contemplates how easy it would be to grab the gun in her bag, to follow the large slicked back hair man, and to flirt with him until he followed her to a secluded place. How much of a fight he would put up, how hard she would have to stab him before he gave up what he knew about Ward. But, what if he isn’t Hydra? What if he is just another creepy middle aged douche bag?_

_So, here she sits stroking her fingers over keys to try to find where Hydra was bunkered down in the city.  She was determined to find them, it was her job. She had never had such a large problem in locating anyone. But that’s what Hydra does, they are the all-time winners of hiding and seek. They hid in the most obvious place for years, and not even Captain America could sniff them out before it was almost too late._

_Around eight her phone rings, Jemma’s name lights up the screen._

_“Hello?”_

_“Good Morning dear!” Jemma’s sing-song voice greets her._

_“Morning,” Daisy replies._

_Jemma pauses for a tick before replying, “I just wanted to wish you a happy birthday! I’m sorry you are spending it in Mays crazy combat training.” She laughs._

_Daisy takes a sip of her cold coffee, “Well, thank you. It’s fine. May is giving me some quiet time today.”_

_She can practically hear Jemma shake her head on the other side of the line, “I’m glad. You deserve it.”_

_Daisy gets up and makes her way over to the barista, “Can I have you heat this up please?” The barista takes the drink and Daisy stands against the bar._

_“Is that the only reason you called Jem?” She questions._

_Jemma clears her throat, “Well, I just know that Lincoln had been trying to get a hold of you…Fitz also says to say happy birthday.”_

_Daisy picks up a straw, messing with the paper wrapper. “I am fine. Just been working.”_

_Jemma doesn’t miss a beat, her voice skeptical.“I thought May gave you a lazy day?”_

_“I am fine Jemma. There is no reason for you to worry about me okay? I promise.” Daisy vows as the barista hands her the cup of coffee back._

_“We are celebrating when you arrive back to base. We will have a cake and candles.” Jemma announces with a new tone to her voice._

_“And lots of booze please.” Daisy smiles into the phone. “I will talk to you later Jem.”_

_She hangs up the phone, and goes to turn back to her table when the barista lays down a cup looking at her, “The guy you’re sitting with ordered this.”_

_Daisy goes to correct the girl but she has started working on another drink, so Daisy leaves the drink where it’s at hoping someone realize it's theirs. However, when she turns back towards her table it all makes since. Sitting with his back to her, in the same chair she has been sitting all morning is a dark haired man in a dark leather jacket, with a beanie atop his head._

_She doesn’t hesitate to grab the drink from the counter before marching back over to the table and all but slamming the drink down in front of him and plopping into the seat across from him. Act cool Daisy, she tells herself as she sits back into the chair, deducing what’s sat in front of her. His eyes are on her laptop screen, his beard is only at a five o’clock shade- meaning he cut it after escaping. Both his hands are on the table top, his left knuckle has freshly broken skin. He looks well aside from that, rested. Overall better than he did two weeks ago._

_She stays silent, sips her drink and quickly glances around. Knowing that there has to be more than one Hydra agent sitting in the small café. Ward slowly closes the laptop screen, his long fingers quick and precise in movement. He reaches for his drink, takes a gulp before making eye contact with her._

_It burns, the way he looks at her. It makes her wonder how many times he had looked at her with such feeling? If he was sitting across from his enemy or across from his former lover. Where they the same thing? Daisy knew they were. “Why thank you birthday girl. You got a minute to spare?”_

_“I’m done with the cat and mouse game Ward. Why are you here?” Daisy asks through gritted teeth._

_He drinks his coffee and slides a hand across her closed laptop, completely confident in his movements. She places her folded hands on the table top across from him. You are not afraid Daisy, her brain screams._

_“Well, I thought a little conversation without papa Coulson watching would be nice. A conversation where you can’t mute me when you don’t like what I have to say.” He bites at her with stormy eyes._

_Daisy snarls sarcastically. “Yeah ‘cause a coffee shop full of undercover Hydra agents seems like a fair playing field.”_

_His left eyebrow quirks and for a split second, she thinks he might tell her she’s wrong. “Now we both know the barista isn’t Hydra. We don’t make that great of coffee.” His voice is monotone, and it sends a shiver up her spine._

_He’s not bluffing, she can feel it. They are all watching, she can practically feel the eyes on her. She can’t run, and that’s what he wanted. She can’t call anyone, and no one is expecting her back for some time. This is Ward’s show. It was a trap. That’s how well he knows you Daisy, he knew you would be here. The perfect spot to trap his mouse._

_“Happy Birthday.” Ward smiles around his words, and he is no longer the top agent of Hydra. He was suddenly the Ward that would kill for her, the Ward that used to make her feel safe._

_“You could have said that over the phone. No need to come all the way out here.” She doesn’t smile back._

_He moves his hands toward her own, and she doesn’t pull away as he slides his hands over the top of hers. For a moment it feels like she can breathe again, after months of suffocation and for a moment she wished he would just kill her and get it over with._

_The table shakes lightly under their grasped hands, the movement subtle. “Careful there with the super inhuman powers. I would almost say that they are rather out of your control.”_

_It’s out of the corner of her eye that she sees the movement. The woman sitting at the bar stiffens at the mention of powers, her hand reaches for her hip. Ready to neutralize the threat. And for a split second Daisy wonders where the young barista had disappeared to._

_Ward follows her gaze and squeezes her hands. “No need to worry. No one moves without my okay, and we both know I would do nothing to hurt you.”_

_She meets his eyes again, wishing she had stayed in bed all day. “I don’t really believe you, Ward.”_

_“Skye, you are lying to yourself-“ Daisy interrupts without hesitation._

_“All you have done is hurt me, Ward.” She confesses and the light throb that is constantly in her chest these days seems to pulsate, as though at any moment her heart is just going to quit fighting; finally give up on her._

_It hurts that she has found herself here, and it hurts that he knows her the way he does. It hurts that no matter how long she closes her eyes his face is still there. Still haunting her._

_“I would never do anything intentionally-“She interrupts before he can finish his overused apology._

_“Ward if I could go back in time and change this I would!” Her raised voice sounds more like a shout in the silent coffee house. “I would give anything to be sitting with you here without all of this. With my Ward. With the person, I thought you were!” Her breathing is heavy and her teary eyes cloud her vision._

_“Skye I know I fucked up. I know I’m the one that made a mess of us and there’s so much I want to tell you…” Ward desperately grips at her hands, surely leaving marks._

_“Then say it!” She begs and her eyes plead with him to give her a reason to stop her hatred._

_Ward’s brown eyes avoid her, and his hands loose on hers. “I’m not sure I know how.”_

_She yanks her hands out from under his, “You’re a coward.” She hisses from behind tears._

_His hurt is written on his face, just like it’s written all over hers. “I know I am and I know that I have fucked this whole thing up but I love you. I think I might always love you. But we both know I can’t go back in time and change all of this Skye. You are who you are and I have made my choices, I am who I am. I wish I wasn’t, for you.”_

_He watches as her tears land on the wooden table causing small, dark stains in the wood. “Are you going to let me leave?” She questions._

_“I don’t want you to.” He states, and she freezes when he stands from his place opposite of her._

_She squirms when her chair screeches against the concrete floors, and suddenly she is facing him as he squats down to her level in front of her. His palms resting softly on her knees. “I wish I could express how sorry I am for everything I did.” It’s a whisper that makes her fingers twitch, makes her want to sink into the heat that he radiates._

_Her curled fists find her sides, and she stops her teeth from aggressively assaulting her bottom lip. Daisy’s eyes finally find him and her brave face doesn’t fool him, but it makes her feel a hell of a lot better to not be crying in front of him._

_She tries to keep her voice as even as she can muster. “I am going to get up and walk out that fucking door. You are going to let me do it. You will stay here and you will not follow me, Grant Ward. Consider it a birthday present.” She smirks with a squint of her eyes._

_His smile reappears slowly and he nods quietly before lifting his hand. It makes her tense up even more, not because she thinks he might hurt her but because she had not planned on him touching her this closely._

_His forefinger slowly runs down the right side of her face, a feathery touch. He abruptly stops at the point in her chin, and she wills her body to do anything but sit there and watch the way he watches her. But alas she just watches and finally, he stands; goes back to his seat leaving her with the next move._

_She refuses to look at him as she shoves her laptop in the bag and shuffles past all the Hydra agents who had just watched as she cried in front of her lover turned enemy._

_“Skye,” He calls out as her hands touch the door, “One day you will give into your feelings, you will allow yourself to feel for me again and I hope when you do it’s not too late.”_

_She wants to ask what the fuck that’s supposed to mean but instead she ducks out the door, and gets lost in the sea of people on the street as her heart beats out of her chest._

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you all enjoy! *crying in Grant Ward feels*


End file.
